You Can Find Yourself Anywhere

I can find myself anywhere.

 

I can find myself in any situation, in any hardship. I can find myself when I am very ill, or in severe heartache. Sometimes, I can find myself more easily when I am weakest. I can find myself in ecstasy and ease. I can find myself when I am destitute, and when money flows like water. I can find myself when I am lost, in fact, getting lost is exactly the way to find yourself.

How can I do all of these things? How can I find myself, be myself when my hair is gone, or body dying, or mind is lost to everything familiar?

I have not cast my anchor in the material. I have not decided that all I am is my physical body. I know that all I am is not a mental experience. I have transcended these things, because I know that I am the consciousness witnessing all this, the artist observing the world and the intricacies of this role, this life story. I am participating fully, and I have manifested this mind and body, these situations through which I birth my consciousness, and it is my job to listen to the inner flow to guide me naturally in allowing mind and body to truly reflect my innermost Self, my soul. 

You are the light that pours trough your eyes, the witness of the heart that cries, you are the love shimmering playfully and curiously, you are the passion and creative urge. 

Everything else is real, but in order to know yourself, you must know that this isn't 'chicken or egg', your energy/soul causes all else to manifest, and changes made in the physical impact the expression of that soul in this world of form, but do not tarnish the essence.

No matter how many times you fail, your consciousness is still within you awaiting the return of your mind and body and heart into alignment with it. It never holds a grudge. You either are functioning partially or fully aligned. Spirit never dies, need changes, isn't corrupted by this one life story. 

So be fearless in living your truth, guided by your sense of inner rightness and you will be a free person walking in this world. Your consciousness/soul will shine through you unimpeded and you will be as a being of light in a world of darkness. Your joy as you taste all the flavors of life without restraining yourself from your authentic shine will illuminate the truth within others. If it is too intense for them, let them step out of the way. All free beings recognize each other, even if they only have moments of true freedom. It begins this way.

This is not just philosophy. This is pure direct experience speaking. If I can do this, anyone can, if they just make an effort and get out of their own way. 

It requires trust, bravery and diligence. It requires patience and a loving heart. It requires the cultivation of simple pleasures and child-like joy. You have what it takes, because you are human. 

Namaste.

Strong Sense of Inner-Rightness

We don't need others to tell us what to do.. when we are confused, we need to ground and spend a little time in nature or alone, exercise or decompress.. and be patient.. keep practicing self-care,  nourishing lifestyle, and staying present, letting go, letting go, letting go..

and at first it happens here and there...

then it happens more..

and more..
until most of our time on this earth is spent with a strong sense of inner-rightness..

it is PEACE,

it is HARMONY with YOUR individual truth,

it is FREEDOM,

and it brngs BLISS, JOY, CONFIDENCE, HEALTH.

REAL FULFILMENT.

Trust inner rightness, not fear..
trust your heart,

trust the UNKNOWN, because it IS intense, but that intensity is the feeling of
INCREDIBLE POTENTIAL ENERGY.. ready to bloom,

but you can't fight it, you have to open to it,

or else your constant questioning will leave you second-guessing into missing every opportunity and beautiful experience life is brining to your hands.

FOLLOW YOU R HEART.. let go of all past, even if it hurts.. because EVERYTHING is fleeting, and love is here in the moment, even if its not from where you wished it to be coming.. and brighter and brighter experiences will come..

the more you live in integrity with your truth, the more whole your satisfaction becomes in life, and love finds you, success finds you, happiness finds you..

it takes PATIENCE to wait for the best gifts.. but each day contains mini-miracles. Stay open and they will rise to meet your eyes, and bring a smile to your lips, put the sway back in your hips, and give you everlasting joy in this world, in spite of an external circumstances.

Blessings.....

It is not the wound that hurts so much..

It is not the wound that hurts so much
by Laura Harrison


How quickly things change
how abruptly things rearrange
plans shatter
hopes scatter
and holding on to what is no longer there
or
was never there
but was so desired
is the part that burns

so many hopes
of happy returns
of something that would last
better then the past

the pain
remains
long after the memory of the disdain paid
is laid to rest
because of the fear

the fear of letting go
the fear of being free
the fear of what you know
.. although

you thought this was it
that this one would last
no matter how fresh
your wound is past

so
let it go
let it go
let it go
let it go

and you will find
that it is not the wound that hurts so much
as your fierce reluctance
to accept that your false hopes
are not reality

let it go
 and you'll be free

and for a minute there is an empty space in the middle of your heart
but if you turn your attention to living your life you'll start
to fill that space with life and love
and in no time
the wound is long gone

only time and being fully here
to the rest of your life,
not just the pain,
will bring you healing
and allow you to perservere

Bust Down Those Walls

Bust Down Those Walls
by Laura Harrison


Bust those walls down, baby!

The faster the walls crash down,
 the sooner you become totally free!!!

Open your heart wider in the face of fear, pain, confusion,
Grow your heart large enough to
Swallow your reality.

Destroy the delusion,
and you will grow brighter, freer, and wiser..
To close is to resist,
to resist is to die.
If you close, the pain
and the darkness will only remain.

You are here to live,
free from the reign
of self-consciousness and fear,
in real happiness and love.
No one is here to live a lie.
You should live your Truth,
and let the self-consciousness die.

Mourning the Mirage

I believe in love. I believe that two people can stay together for a very long time and truly remain in love with each other. I also believe that finding this kind of love is a birthright, but that most people jump the gun and miss the mark. I don't know about there being just one... I tend to see romantic relationships as a progression, and an opportunity for growth, perhaps ending up at one that works for the long haul... or perhaps just relationships of varying lengths throughout our lifetime... the answer to this probably varies for each person's life story.

Most, if not all, people have the strong urge to pair up- to find someone, a partner, to share life with. We all want someone to love us just the way we are, through thick and thin, someone to have fun with, to be intimate with, to curl up with, a friend, but so much more. And no one wants to get old alone, right? We want a partner in life especially perhaps so that we are not lonely when we are old and so that we do not die alone.

I think all too often, because we are so excited to find this someone or a someone that fits the bill, we take our good intentions and excitement too far and we meet someone that we like alright, and in our heads we try to make the square peg fit into the round hole. We kind of convince ourselves that this person is exactly what we want and need, because, well, they are here now. We sell ourselves a dream, we compromise, or settle as people often say.

Human beings are very excellent at rationalizing things. We can even rationalize ourselves into love. My theory on falling in love is that we see this person we have met, and we know or perceive some things about them, but there are many gaps where we simply do not have information. Our mind superimposes our own feelings, wishes and views upon them, filling in these gaps and creating a connection to them as being who and what we perceive them to be- filled with our own ideas as much as or more then the reality of who they actually are.

When the "honeymoon stage" wears off, I think we begin to see someone as a little bit closer to what or who they are, as opposed to the image we have built in our minds of who we imagined them to be that we actually fell in love with. Then we may fall in love with the more real version of who they are, or we may say to ourselves, maybe even to them, "you've changed. I wish you would be the same as when we first fell in love.", "Why are things so different?", "What changed?" We may be pleasantly surprized, and form a solid relationship based on two people caring about each other, growing as individuals and growing together.  This is the ideal scenario, and it certainly can and does happen.

Sadly, more often we are incredibly let down when we reach this point. But because we had such a strong connection and investment in who we thought they were, we stay. We also stay often times because no one wants to be lonely, or be the bad guy or girl that breaks a heart. So we drag out a relationship that we are not happy in well past the point of realization that this is not working and is over. This describes a lot of marriages and relationships, unfortunately. We have all seen it and or been there: the couple that bickers over nothing, shows no signs of being in love, caring, touching or even intimacy. It is the zombie-ghost-image of a couple. No one wants it, but so many people settle for it for fear of social disapproval, for fear of hurting the other (even though nothing would hurt me worse then being unwanted and strung along), for fear of being alone (as if there are no other people in the universe or as if sleeping alone might kill you instantly).

People are clingers, we are. We get attached to an idea of reality and like to stick to that better then owning up to real truth because we are scared little beings. We seem so mighty when we raze a landscape of trees to build a strip mall, or when we kill each other with giant, crazy weapons for very archaic or materialistic motives, but when it comes to the one-on-one scale, and our inner workings, we are very fragile and frightened creatures.

Many break-ups and divorces are a long time coming before they come, and this whole experience is why... we were never in love with each other, but in love with the idea we had of who the other was. When we woke up and saw this other person for who they actually were, we realized we weren't really connected.

Knowing this can help make handling break-ups easier. We begin to see that instead of losing "the one" we are moving forward and one step closer to finding someone we are genuinely in love with. We have to recognize the image we had of our partner is what we were in love with and who we are missing. We can have great fondness or even love for the person we actually were with... in time we may develop a very deep friendship. And we can move forward, and with great care we can listen deeply and honestly to our hearts and let ourselves fall in love naturally, instead of rushing it or forcing it.

Even very conscious people will most likely superimpose some of their own wishes upon the reality of the being they are with at the start, but when that image fades, it is possible to recognize the difference between fantasy and reality and love reality when it sets in. It takes discernment, patience, and compassion. It takes honesty and strength to be upfront with ourselves, because love is an interesting thing. We can choose to be loving people, and to widen our circle of compassion to include all beings, all life, the entire universe, but romantic love is a fickle thing. True romantic compatability, being "in love" as it is called, I believe is a very subtle thing. It is based on energy and vibrations... either two beings are harmonious or not, and the depth of their harmony determines the depth of their relationship. If as two beings progress through life, as both evolve and change, if their energetic vibrations remain harmonious through all of the transformations, then they will happily be able to stay together. There are likely to be times when they are not harmonious here and there, but harmony can be cultivated, and these patches where they do not resonate beautifully should be brief. Too many people remain trapped and held back out of fear, when this is actually stunting both people tremendously; mentally, emotionally, physically, spiritually....

We can strive to become as aware as possible, to avoid these pitfalls, to own the truth of our life situation with strength and integrity, out of respect for ourselves and for each other. We can let go of trying to change the other person to fit the ideas and images we projected onto them or wished for them to fulfill and we can allow ourselves to either move on or fall in love with the actual person we are with. Any move made in honesty, compassion and integrity with reality will enrich both people's lives for the better, even if pain is part of the process.

January 2012 teaching: The Bravery to Bloom

 "And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom."   ~Anais
Nin


Yoga practices help us to clear away the debris that gets in the way of expressing our innermost and highest nature. It helps us to clear away all that is false to be
our true selves. Many of us, I daresay in the Western world especially, all of us, at one time or another struggle with our confidence or our self-image. For some of
us, that negative view is debilitating and robs us of all real joy in life. For some, our harsh self-view is the ultimate obstacle to freedom in life. There comes a
point when, as Rumi calls it, we reach, "self-hating fatigue", the point at which we cannot stand to be so filled with hate, anger, guilt, and sadness. This is the
point from which we give up clinging to our fear, and we are ready to blossom. We can give up the habits of negative self-talk, self-depreciating, passive-agressive
self destruction and finally begin to have compassion for our self as a living being.


Anyone can sit in self-pity and misery if it is their habit, but it takes true bravery to begin to care for ourselves. And once we do, we see that to care for oneself
is not selfish, but is the only way to care for others. When the cup of our heart is empty, we have nothing to give to others, we are not kind or compassionate. But
when the cup of our heart is full, that which overflows can be given to all around us, we are automatically kinder, more joyful, more helpful and patient. Being deeply
honest makes the world a better place by our mere presence. Following our heart conscience is the way to blossom and brighten the world. Our happiness lights the way
for those around us.


Building trust in your own heart-conscience by experience, you learn that you can withstand anything that life brings and that there is beauty to be found everywhere.



NO ROOM FOR FORM by RUMI





On the night when you cross the street
From your shop and your house
To the cemetery




You'll hear me hailing you from inside
The open grave, and you'll realize
How we've always been together.




I am the clear consciousness-core
Of your being, the same in
Ecstasy as in self-hating fatigue.




That night, when you escape your fear of snakebite
And all irritations with the ants, you'll hear
My familiar voice, see the candle being lit,
Smell the incense, the surprise meal fixed
By the lover inside all your other lovers. This heart tumult is my signal
to you igniting in the tomb.
So don't fuss with the shroud
And the graveyard dust.
Those get ripped open and washed away
In the music of our final meeting.

And don't look for me in human shape,
I am inside your looking. No room
For form with love this strong.

Beat the drum and let the poets speak.
This is the day of purification for those who
Are already mature and initiated into what love is.

No need to wait until we die!
There's more to want here than money
And being famous and bites of roasted meat.

Now, what shall we call this new sort of gazing house
That has opened in our town where people sit
Quietly and pour out their glancing
Like light, like answering?

'No room for form' by Jelaluddin Rumi page 138 'The 'Essential Rumi' translations by Coleman Barks. Harper Collins 1995

We are all one... Reach out in Love

The tragedy in Japan is so sad. If we hear about destruction and suffering like this, and take a moment to be mindful, we can't help but feel it viscerally. There's an ache. A hurt. A deep longing. A desire to remove the suffering, heal the sick restore peace. I've never felt this way though... There's more connection then ever before. There may or may not be anyone I know personally there in Japan, and at the same time those are my loved ones, my friends, my family. The children are my children, the elders my grandparents. I'm not being idealistic, I feel connected.

Tragedy and disaster have a way of bringing out the best in people. We reach out a hand for someone in obvious need. We forget about the illusion of "us" and "them" if only for a moment. Sometimes, when something is broken down, its as if it breaks down our inhibitions too. We are more genuinely human.
With a deep urge to help, and discussion with some of my student-friends, I decided to reach out to a yoga studio in Tokyo. I thought that the best way to help would be to give, yogi to yogi, believing that they would be able to reach someone in need for us.

What has transpired has meant so much to me, it is hard to do it justice by relaying it in its simplicity, but I'll try. It shows that we are all connected. It also shows that while material assistance helps materially, heart-felt expression helps the heart. Without heart, material assistance cannot end suffering.

When I contacted the studio, OhanaSmile in Tokyo with my words of heart-felt feelings of oneness, longing to alleviate their suffering and offer to help, I received a beautiful response. I received the energy of real gratitude, and the message said the recipient was "deeply touched" by my message. While a link to donate to the Japanese Red Cross was given, what was asked for first, almost preferably, was for me to simply share my feelings on a yoga community forum, even taking the time to translate each part of the form so that I could really understand it. The message was ended with, "hontou ni domo arigatou gozaimasu"- I truly thank you very much, words which resonated with a lot of deep feeling.

The owner of OhanaSmile yoga studio, with whom I am conversing, also runs a yoga community website, a place for Yogis and Yoginis to post thoughts, conversations and discussions. It was on this site that it was requested I post, and I did. I posted A very raw, honest message to the people in Japan.

I posted from my heart, my feelings of oneness, my sincere desire to serve, to help, to relieve their suffering and bring peace again. I shared that I felt priveleged to share my feelings with them, and I truly do still feel it. I can feel passionately about this tragedy, but keeping it to myself or even among Americans feels one way. But sharing my heart with someone there, experiencing this as a reality, has transformed the energy of the feelings. I really felt that greater connection, interconnection, and oneness come alive.

There was another option, to upload a picture, but I didn't think much of it. The most important thing for me was to share those feelings. To say I'm deeply sorry you are hurting and I love you.
Within a couple hours, I was written back, asking for my picture, to place with the post. I feel connected. Its amazing that my words meant something, enough that I'm not simply forgotten. It's not me, per se or "my" words- its just the power of love, Love in service of Itself.

Some people say the world is going to end soon. I think that just the world as we know it will end. The charade of separation is getting too old and painful to continue. Let the veils lift, and may we all see the truth of our ultimate oneness, and live in the harmony of kindness and true love.

I am thinking that I will try reaching out like this more often, whenever the inspiration is present. I have been living a practice of deep honesty for a little while now, which includes sensitive expression of my true thoughts & feelings when appropriate. It's like this wonderful song, the title & artist I do not know, but the refrain is "...and the moment slipped away..." The singer recognizes these outstanding qualities or true bravery in various people throughout the song, but instead of sharing her loving appreciation right then when she is touched by it, see lets it go, and loses the opportunity to express that respect and kindness. Hearing that song for the first time in 2006, the year I first started the studio, moved me to tears. I started then to practice my hardest to not let a moment slip away, to express my loving appreciation, gratitude, admiration and respect right away. Until embracing this practice, I never overtly recognized the power of a smile, thank you, or a truly honest compliment to positively affect someone, to actually brighten their day. A kind word from the heart is so powerful!

Yet, until now this practice has been more focused on people I know face-to-face, although it has transformed the way I interact at all times to some extent.

Now, I will practice this deep honesty in a new way, reaching out beyond "here", inspired by Yoga's wisdom and this very beautiful experience..

The Need to Walk Your Own Path: forget how you are supposed to be and just be

One downfall of traditional Yoga teaching, especially hatha yoga and lineage-based teachings, is that they emphasize regimented procedures for progressing on the spiritual path. The purpose of these strict rules is to try and make sadhana accessible to all, but these same people become trapped in the form of "how to do it" or "this way is the only right way because Swami did it this way".
Getting caught in attachment to formal rituals and methods stunts our spiritual progress. Learning from qualified teachers is important. Following their lessons and respecting their teachings is important. Then there comes a point where you lose the training wheels and go beyond. Through the gift of awareness, you receive creative inspiration, and you follow that. That is how the tradition has evolved over the centuries. It is a living tradition of evolving the consciousness, of seeing beyond the common view of reality.
What is the point of the teachings, of any spiritual teachings? To describe the Indescribable, to help you to touch the ground of being, the Source; to lead you to experience what many people call God. To evolve the consciousness enough to be able to percieve the true depth of reality, we need a lot of guidance, and to do a lot of inner-work. We need teachings, we need a path to follow. Yet, we can be crippled by clinging to the teachings for the answers. The teachings want us to walk our own path, to experience the Unseen for ourselves.
It is a form of fear that has us clinging onto to techniques and procedures rigidly. It is a form of learned helplessness to discount the credibility of our own deepest intuitions and experiences. We all are equally connected to the same Source, and we all can reach our Buddha nature or Christ consciousness (one in the same) someday.
Listen well to your teacher, follow well the true teachings, but don't ignore the spiritual-heart, the direct line of communication from the Source, the living creative impulse of Universal Consciousness. The teachings of your life situation and the following of that feeling of lightness and deep peace that comes from spiritually uplifting actions is YOUR path.

Life is sadhana, the spiritual journey. Spiritual practice is not something you do for an hour a day or five times a day, because every moment is equally sacred. Your entire life is your path, your sadhana. Your challenges are for your strengthening and purification, your happiness grows your love and connection to peace. Nothing goes unseen, there is no exception to that, everything counts.
We have to walk our own path, and no amount of clinging or fear can change that! So let all forms go, surrender to the ocean current and just become awareness and kindness in every moment. We must each witness the Indescribable, the sublimity and elegant intricacy of the fabric of life, with our own heart.