You Can Find Yourself Anywhere

I can find myself anywhere.

 

I can find myself in any situation, in any hardship. I can find myself when I am very ill, or in severe heartache. Sometimes, I can find myself more easily when I am weakest. I can find myself in ecstasy and ease. I can find myself when I am destitute, and when money flows like water. I can find myself when I am lost, in fact, getting lost is exactly the way to find yourself.

How can I do all of these things? How can I find myself, be myself when my hair is gone, or body dying, or mind is lost to everything familiar?

I have not cast my anchor in the material. I have not decided that all I am is my physical body. I know that all I am is not a mental experience. I have transcended these things, because I know that I am the consciousness witnessing all this, the artist observing the world and the intricacies of this role, this life story. I am participating fully, and I have manifested this mind and body, these situations through which I birth my consciousness, and it is my job to listen to the inner flow to guide me naturally in allowing mind and body to truly reflect my innermost Self, my soul. 

You are the light that pours trough your eyes, the witness of the heart that cries, you are the love shimmering playfully and curiously, you are the passion and creative urge. 

Everything else is real, but in order to know yourself, you must know that this isn't 'chicken or egg', your energy/soul causes all else to manifest, and changes made in the physical impact the expression of that soul in this world of form, but do not tarnish the essence.

No matter how many times you fail, your consciousness is still within you awaiting the return of your mind and body and heart into alignment with it. It never holds a grudge. You either are functioning partially or fully aligned. Spirit never dies, need changes, isn't corrupted by this one life story. 

So be fearless in living your truth, guided by your sense of inner rightness and you will be a free person walking in this world. Your consciousness/soul will shine through you unimpeded and you will be as a being of light in a world of darkness. Your joy as you taste all the flavors of life without restraining yourself from your authentic shine will illuminate the truth within others. If it is too intense for them, let them step out of the way. All free beings recognize each other, even if they only have moments of true freedom. It begins this way.

This is not just philosophy. This is pure direct experience speaking. If I can do this, anyone can, if they just make an effort and get out of their own way. 

It requires trust, bravery and diligence. It requires patience and a loving heart. It requires the cultivation of simple pleasures and child-like joy. You have what it takes, because you are human. 

Namaste.

Inner Image & Interaction

There is a view of ourselves that we unconsciously carry... Often derived from the labels we have identified with and our insecurities accrued over the years...

I believe that carrying an outdated or distorted inner image of oneself is the root of body dysmorphia (along with intense sensitivity to energy & no knowledge as to how to care for & balance one's energy field)... And that it is one of our greatest obstacles preventing us from stepping into the life of fulfillment and abundance that we deserve. If we see ourselves in a false and "ugly" way, we cannot see ourselves successful and happy, and keep ourselves trapped in a cycle of self-sabotage.

Made conscious we can update this inner image.. Which is crucial because a picture is worth a thousand words, and this inner view contains a weight, a tone, a whole way of relating to oneself and the world.

For example, for most of my life I saw myself as ugly, stocky, plain and tomboyish. Most people say I am none of these things. So I have been rehabbing my inner image for years, but most consciously and intently over the last couple months. I am seeing positive changes in the way I feel day-to-day.

I am cultivating what I know myself to be in the way I carry myself, dress, act and relate to others, and I take a few minutes each day to notice what I actually look like. I make the changes to my appearance necessary in order to keep a sense of rightness and congruency.. That my outer self reflects my heart and inner truth. And I notice what I actually look like and the difference between that and the standard/habitual image in my mind.

Typically we stare at and fixate on what we consider our flaws.. And all we do is torture ourselves with that practice. Take care of yourself, of course, but accept your uniqueness as well.. Focus on your beauty, your shine, your power, your spark..

It takes a while to update the mental picture we habitually carry of ourselves, but without doing so, we allow ourselves to manifest our entire life based on a version of ourselves craved out of our insecurities, fears and shame. This is a version of ourself that may never have materially existed, but because it exists within our mind, we create our life as that person.

Strive to update your inner face, see yourself for your best qualities. Wen you practice balanced self-care, you will feel good, and when you feel good internally, you will enjoy what you see externally. What we see is interpreted by the brain, after all.

Never Settle

I want to get down on my hands and knees
and put my head to the earth
Crying happy tears,
Crying thank you, and please!!
For in all of my searching no man has seen my worth

But you

You do
-


For all I have given
I have never been seen
I've been sought, taken and forsaken
One too many times
And I refused to abide

I didn't make the rules to game
But I took the reigns
And sent them away
-I no longer wanted to play


Worthless sentiments
And condescending compliments
Walking on eggshells
Men with no honor
Patting me on the head
Empty heads, lights out,
Checked out, soul hidden behind a wall
Doesn't matter what that soul looks like
If they choose to bury it behind brick and mortar
In a basement, dingy dark and stairs steep
It's they who choose to sleep
Refuse to keep
Integrity

They made me sick
They made me tired
But I forced myself at the worst of times
To never abandon my desire..
For what I deserve

I may have stayed longer than I should've
But I did know how to let it go

I fought with everything to preserve
My sanctity
My faith
In my own heart
And in life

And I have won
-

So to you all
I say

When you are the most sick and tired,
When you no longer wish to play

Walk away.
And hold on...

Not to the users, the abusers
Weak-willed & hypocritical
Living in hypotheticals
Taking
Draining you

Love is not love
That suffocates

Do not negate
Your value
For a half-manifestation
Close but no cigar
You've come too far
In your life
To resign to tolerate
Horrible treatment
Don't settle.

Walk away
And hold on.

Never settle.

I'd rather sleep alone
Than with a poser or a prick
People pretending to be so conscious
Afraid to look in the mirror
They make me sick

Don't waste your time
With one who refuses to grow
And you had better face the mirror
Face the music
Do the work
Walk your talk

Strive to uphold your integrity
Live your life, follow your inspirations
And don't worry

And never settle..
And your day will come..

One
Worthy
Of
Your love.

Meet Me In Between

My brain and body have finally
Caught up to my soul
Which has loved you
I suspect always
And has even caused the symptoms
Of love
Which I did not see
Until my brain was ready

I already know that I love you
With all of me
So slowly
Show me
All of the causes
For my love
And manifestations
Of that soul
I so love
As it trickles through the facets of your mind and form

Quiet still nights
With the echoes of trains
Let the others sleep
Let them have their normality
As we cannot settle for that

And I will meet you in the center
Of everything
As you are of the night
And I of the day
We are just the same,
And of complimentary
Corresponding colors,
The same and yet not at all
Yet brighter
Together
Than ever
Alone

Somehow I breathe easier
Stand taller
Dance lighter of foot
Smile brighter
Love deeper
Sing truer
I am simply more alive
Because of you

And we will meet in the center
Of ourselves and all opposites

I was whole without you
I found boundless joy and was alive all alone
Just the sky and I
But the sky couldn't hold me
The trees couldn't speak
And your mind is as fascinating as the stars
And as ancient

So let me unfold you
Slowly
And see me
As soul
Dancing in the kitchen
Soul upholding
Physical form
Your chef
And sweet goddess

And let me see you
And how you work
In the world of form
Let me know this soul
I already love so

And I will give you all of me
When I meet you in the center
The Inbetween
The balance of all opposites,
Dawn and dusk
Equinoxes
After all,
You are a libra
And I am the flowing, never-ending waters
Of love and enraptured synchronicity

And I love you
Boundlessly
From far beyond just me
Meet me
Sweet love
In between.

Revealed By The Light Of the Moon

Pretty lady, full moon
Keeping me awake
Intensity, immensity,
That I can hardly take!
Was it your design,
To leave behind,
New feelings in your wake?


Mysteries
Can be misery
Commiserate,
Or far better
To Correlate.
Seeing Patterns liberates,
Consciousness Consecrates,
Understanding provides relief.


Full moon, mother,
You bring powerful sleepless nights,
And fight your wisdom,
I will not.


I am not in the practice of fighting the tides...
And full moon lady I will not hide.


Wake me out of a sound night's sleep,
Reminding me of promises that I shall keep,
Shining light on the places dark and deep,
Moon mother stir my soul.


Pretty lady, full moon
Silent sage,
Inspire, conspire,
Sweet dewey light.
What you reveal,
Day can no longer conceal,
Tell me it was always your plan!?


Once we look inside..
We can no longer hide..
From what is revealed by the light of the moon.

Ode To Fact

Just because I can let go
Doesn't mean the truth doesn't show
Just because I shouldn't be in my head
Doesn't mean the energy isn't being read

It just means I can let it go and be at peace
The present moment sets me free
And we have some things about which to speak
But I need not let it worry me


Oh reality
Thick and deep
Filled with love
And intensity
Nigh agony
Under which I could let myself sink
But I will choose to float


Reality, reality,
Preference has nothing to do with thee
I have to choose what it is you bring
That's what I'm discovering
But I can turn my mood around
There's great power in that I've also found


Oh reality
Thick and deep
Filled with love
And intensity
Brutal, almost agony
Under which I could let myself sink
But I will choose to float


I'll take this heart and take this light
And I acknowledge my feelings tonight
But I will believe in what I see
Which says that I am always free
So if you want me, come to me,
Or through unknown the trust will breech
Let me in, with well-placed speech
Needn't be many words, but a crucial few
Open to me and I'll give everything to you.

My Light and Love

This love and light that I am
Is like glass
Is like light itself pouring at the one receiving it

And this loving-light can be bright
Intense
Like a mirror
Sometimes it's a harsh experience
To be exposed
To be held accountable
Because this mirror reflects
A level of truth
Most humans never wish to know
The level of truth
That is where we are all going

And to the one seeing their reflection in the words and eyes of the mirror

It can reveal that with which they struggle most within

That which they maybe wished was hidden

All the details of your skin you wish were a secret
The imperfections, the lines

All the things you don't know how to accept

Or love
Or change
Or face
(The fears, the patterns, the times you wish to disappear)

& Yet

This mirror offers no judgement
In the brightness of the light
In the stark exposure of your defects
This mirror doesn't begrudge
Never thinks less
In fact only more

It caresses your humanity
With it's light
Filled with love
Unconditional love

Because this mirror
Has battled
Still has it's struggles
Still grows clearer
By it's own striving
Still aches
But just less than it used to
And with the peace of tested & proven faith

And it shows you what you have to look forward to
The reward of your agonizing work
As a human stepping into it's greatness and divinity

And i am still learning
So it seems
For the men closest to me
How to be true to my force
Like the ocean
Like the sun and moon
Like a wave
Like a mirror
Pouring light
Accepting no degree of falsity
And still not harm them as I scrub off their shells, as I expose their fragility

To me
Your vulnerability
Is filled with beauty
As much as your strength
Perhaps even more

I only want to let you know
You are loved
Cherished
Cradled
By my seeing
And I stand to empower
your magnificence
Because it is all I see within you
Shining back at me
Light meeting light
Mirrors reflecting souls
And like mirrors do
Two
Amplify the light
Exponentially
Greater than separately

I am not daunted by the details you call defects
Or wish to remain anonymous within
I see you as a spiritual warrior,
Being of light
But maybe in the power
And intensity
Of my light and of my love
It is an unknown force
Hard to understand

The combination is not what mere mortals tend to enjoy
Or expect
Or have the willingness to withstand

I must be authentic
I am this mirror
I want my equal mirror
To unabashedly expose me
With omniscient love
Within the light
And for us to support each other's transcendence of mortality
Into the realm of divinity

Equal partners are always equal
Not by refusing to be vulnerable
Or putting on airs
Or hoisting walls of safety
But by knowing
their wholeness and strength isn't compromised
By flowing
with the need
To lean into the other &
work out spiritual growth together
Share the burden
Shine two lights and expose solution faster

Sometimes you'll lean into my arms,
And I will stroke your hair and
pouring limitless undying love
over you like honey
Make the harshness of this lesson, this moment bearable...like love meditation

Or loving you enough to grant you sabbatical, if you need to climb the Mount Everest within alone, this is not unknown and upon that, from the distance, my light can be shone

And at times I will certainly need you to hold me,
cradle me,
surround my fragility
with the strength of your flesh and your ancient soul..
just hold me
and let me silently heal the subtle remnants of wounds from when I didn't have you..
Many years of needing to be held with no arms,
No light to see mine,
Or reflect my love,
did leave behind harm..

And typically, we'll dance,
create, escalate
into exponentially
higher realms of consciousness than we ever reached
before and much faster
and more freely
than we could have
If you and me
Weren't mirrors for each other's souls
For each other's greatness
For each other's truth
Pouring love and light
Like the sun
Over each other
Like a blessing
Like a prayer
Like divinity itself
Like the air
Weightlessly
Supporting
The life and beauty it surrounds
So gently
But so powerfully

Equal footing
Sharing the burden
Catalyzing the destruction and creation of universes within each other
And allowing space for all we need
Separately
And together

I will never again allow
Anything less than a sacred relationship

Please know
That although I expose
In the mirror
Of my heart
Everything
You are never nothing less than sacred to me
And I would love you as my spiritual practice
To grow brighter
By honoring you
And fighting the battle
To release all fear
And let love create my reality
Kiss you
Cascade my love and unending reverence upon you
Leaving divine light on your skin
And treasure you for everything that makes you
You
Divinely human
Complicated
Infinite
And unique

Let Go.

I can let go
Of anything
Witness the wonder
And I have seen
Countless times
When my world
Has crumbled
And turned to ash
And still
Better came
And I was glad
That my heart
Was torn out of my chest
I have no reason to doubt
But just as each
is better
than the last
This time
It was so sacred
That letting go
Is like destroying
My entire universe twice
And although I still
Must let you go completely
I have resisted
As long as possible
Not because I fear my path
Or lack faith
But because
Of the incredible circumstances
Under which we celebrated
Our union
Miracle upon miracle
And I now am embarrassed
Because I've outstayed my welcome
I have more dignity than this
I know better
I trust the universe
You'll come get me if you want me
And if you don't want me
So be it
The universe will bring better
I have faith
And know it will be so
Even if I myself can't fathom better
So here it is
I can't hold on anymore
And I'm being childish anyhow
So at the count of three
You become neutral to me
And I have no more right to remember you
And you don't exist
Until I heal
I'm sorry it took so long
You were my favorite
But I know better than all this
Much better
One,
Two,
Three.

In Our Own Time

When we met
I saw you
As a reflection of me
But rejected the possibility
Though never completely
But I wasn't ready

Love, there's no knowing
In the moment why
But we can't lie
When we aren't ripe
There's no need to rush
The picking,
To hush,
The process..
The clock's ticking
Is a fantasy.

Ageless souls
Know
In their own
Time
And
I worked
In mine
My way
To You And I

Faces
Feelings
Experiences
Prepared me
For what would be
As it drew closer
I knew you'd come

I may have thought
I was there before
But nothing can
Shake this
Knowing
This experience is showing
Me what I always knew
Love could be

Thank God
With all my heart and soul
For all the plans
Every man
Everything that crashed
Crushed
Destroyed
Cut
Tore
Every door
Shut,
Each opened, &
For my wisdom
to stay wide open
In the face
Of devastation
Manifestation
Proven true
Miracles proven
In meeting you
Synchronicity
And
God
were real to me
But reality
Has made it
Abundantly clear
This can't disappear
Solid knowing
Like I know how to breathe
That this is meant to be
That we are here for mutual love and creativity
And I bow, my head
To the ground
And I now, instead,
Of striving to believe
See
Breathe
Feel
Omnisciently
God is the fabric of Reality
And
We can explore this through
The connection between you and me

We may have felt it coming
Longing, loving, the energy humming
But now,
Is our time,
Ageless souls
In their own time
Find
Their corresponding
Kind.

I'm ready..
Now is our time. <3

My Sacred Love

Everything we do in each day is an act of worship because life is sacred. The spiritual and the mundane are not separate whatsoever. By bringing our full consciousness and heart to each moment, we bring sacredness from the invisible into the visible world of form. This poem is about how my love for my man, and cherishing the radiance of his soul, is a form of worship for me. I recognize the Divinity within all that is... So that is the place from which we connect.




~MY SACRED LOVE~

I want to build an altar
Underneath you
Scatter rose petals at your feet
I want to light incense
Close my eyes
And feel the entire universe within me

I want to set you
on my altar
Like a statue
Not because I am putting you on a pedestal
Or endeavor to restrict you
But because
I feel the Divine in you
So clearly
You remind me
It's within me
And everything
You inspire me
In your energy
To recall
That I too
Exist omnisciently

It's the fabric of life,
Divinity,
But some of us
Cover it over
with heaps of rags
and blankets
But you,
My sweet love,
Expose the sacred fabric
Of your soul
To the light, to the air
And to all the elements
Displaying your love-light for all to see
Selflessly sharing God with us all

I want to touch my head to the ground
By your feet
In humble gratitude
To a universe so sweet
As to,
Against all odds,
Bring us together
To allow me to be your lover

You move me
In a way
Not found
Everyday
Once
In
A
Lifetime

It comes
Here I come
To once again do puja
I know God is real
When I'm near you

And I become God's omniscience
When I lose myself in love with you

But let me light some incense
And touch the temple of your soul
And once again
Merge
Remember
And be renewed
By the freshness
Of your energy

Our love
My love for you
This shared journey
Has been enough to prove
That God exists
And I see Him
Everywhere I look
But never have I felt it
Quite a magnificently
As I do when I gaze upon you

That is why
When I love you
I am also worshipping the Divine
My intention
In Touching you
In Kissing you
In Cooking for you
In Listening to you
In Loving you
In the life we create together
Is to honor and celebrate
To commemorate
To nurture
The sacredness within you
With all of the sacredness within me.

Merging

I believe in 1+1=2
I remain me
And you remain you
But devote ourselves
To the nurturing
Of this love
That has been revealed
As our truth

The proof
Of miracles
Existing
Exists
In our kiss..

Without improbable
Unstoppable
Synchronistic
Majestic
Grace

Our first meeting
Never
Could've taken place

-

Reminisce
With me love
Heaven is not found above
But inside
And in the union of us

-
In the faces
The places
The lovers
The losses
The pain
The clarity gained

In the hopes
And sorrows
The promising tomorrows
The path of my past was whispering you

You...

-
I criticized with no malice
The people whose palace
was built
On believing that they were
walking halves
Never whole
Always Alone
Mourning an empty throne
And though I don't condone
That way
Because we are the whole
And wholeness minus wholeness
Still wholeness remains
The value of one or all remains
the same

We are each whole,
You and I
Found it on our own
Each a perfect reflection
Of the universe
Diverse
Microcosmic macrocosms
Radiant
Nothing but light and joy
Love and delight
Trusting our insight..

But now
I understand
How one could see
The divinity
Of the merging of two souls,
Meant to be,
As halves
Reuniting

I divine female
And you the male
Together
We create the entire cosmos
I melt:
Out of one body,
Inhabiting two,
And none,
And everything in this universe,
All in one

And your life and peace
Are as dear to me
As my own
Your joy
Is my joy
A perfect reflection
Of each other's light
Two consciousnesses
Collaborating
In the effort
Of living happy and free
In complete flow
With reality

We are nothing
But everything,
But the entire universe,
In two bodies
Joined as one

A sacred
Unified
Field of energy
Two souls
Two pieces of the universe
Identical,
But diverse
Attracted like breath
To the lungs
Light to the eye
It is clear
In you
That all is divine
All I see is you and me
I see you see me
And in you I see
Pure sacredness
Divinity

If each of us alone
Has the power
To move mountains
Cause fountains
Of
Love to flow
What can we know
What can we reveal
With two hearts
Two minds
And all this love we feel?
What can we create
With two hearts free of hate?

You will uplift millions
And maybe this
Is soul-work for two..
Who feel like one..

Who accept only truth
From self and each other
Sacred lovers
The entire universe loving itself
Love itself loving love itself

Just a magnification
Of the brightest of lights
Through two prisms
Perfectly corresponding
Naturally responding
A unified field of pure love
Two bodies that can form one
Upon will
And will as they will
Because the force of love
is too strong
to remain apart
for very long..

So I think
Now it's shown
My math was
A bit wrong
As it's become known
That
1+1=1

On our own
We are whole
But together
We are a bigger wholeness
And more greatness
Is possible
With two hearts
Two minds
Two bodies
Two souls
Who know
That they are the light of the sun
And are also one.

The Sparrow's Song

We all want to be loved

Hey, we all want to know

That we make someone's heart

Melt

Soul Dance

And in my years 

I have seen

Many connections

Soul mates

Appear

Rise

Fall 

And fade away

Disappear

I have no fear

There only is a certain window

I evolve so fast

We are only on the same page

A brief moment

It cannot last

If the other can't 

keep up

With me

This is my reality.

This is how it goes

Nobody knows

How

Or when

Another 

Comes it goes

As soon as one fades

Though 

Another

Seems to surface...

There is always one 

Deeper than the rest

And several

Several

Trying their best 

To reach me

Standing my ground, 

staying me, 

not stopping 

to appease

No matter how much

 I want

This one to last...

But,

Give me a few moments

Few breaths

To savor this 

And breathe this love

Into my chest

I cannot rest

If it's a lie

I cannot nest

In a disguise..

I can not 

slow down

I will keep flying

Until I've found

one who isn't lying

Though mildly trying

With best intentions

Just not my match

Purpose pauses

It's not coincidence 

My eyes did catch

Upon your eyes

& 

Within your soul

And recognizing you

Brought me closer to my goal

All you soul mates

That cannot match me

You are lanterns

Guiding me in the night sky

Flying into the breeze

Crisp and refreshing,

Almost biting

But not cruel

This wind stirs me to my depths

It's taking me

Somewhere true

Home is where my heart is

And love is who I am

And I still believe 

There is a love for me

One man

I salute the lanterns

Guiding my flight

Keeping me warm

Momentary delight

But I cannot stop

To stay with you

You would fly with me

If that were true

I love you

I bless you

Thank you, 

Dear Soul

This sparrow 

Must keep flying

Into the unknown.

Sent from my iPhone

Poison As The Antidote

It's time
I see
I didn't know
I needed to release
Until the poison
Seeped deeply
Wicked up
inside of me
I resisted
Unrelentless
In my Pursuit
Of the truth
I strived
To stay alive
And learn I did
Survive I did


I let the acrid
bitter
Bitchiness
Scour off the shell
I can't blame
it all
on the boys
In men's clothing
But their loathing
Was toxic
To an extraordinary degree
Slowly eating away
At my bliss
and
Stripping me
Of my freedom
By strapping
Cinder blocks
Of heavy cynicism
And the judgement
of their insecurity
On my delicate
Loving
Form

But
It wasn't theirs alone
it dragged
Old scars
up
from the well
From many moons
Many lifetimes ago

The heaviness
That I once endured
And fought so hard
To become pure of
A Renaissance
Of joy and ease

And their heavy hands
Shattered
My delicate figurine form
Ridiculed my grace
And pushed me down
So that they could feel strong
When we were
Face to face

Sometimes you don't know
Until you are ill
When someone doses you slowly
And out of love
You drink your fill
It can take many years
Before you see
That "the one I loved
Was poisoning me"

So the lead you
We're pouring
Down
My throat
When I was
Asleep
Was not enough
To kill me
And
Not enough to keep
Me from opening
my eyes
And
From learning to rise
Once again

And I used
It to learn
How to become
Even
More free
And how to
More sharply attune
To my reality

I watch myself
And though
I was graced
To keep it
Mainly
At
Bay

I feel the bitter
Chunky
Vomitus
Energy
Pouring out of me
I choke on the bit
Like sawdust and sputum
Violently bitter..

The sway of my hips
My sweetness of tone
My kind, loving gaze
My joy when alone
My peace
My smile
My acceptance

I am slowly floating back to the surface
To the light of me
Back to my beauty
Again I can breathe

You stole my peace
But I used it to purge past wounds
I harbor no regret or ill will
But Your venom now
is just your own

I am once again at home
In my heart
In my life
Clearer
Than before

I will have bled
The rotten black sap
Viscous and viscous
Out of my soul
Until there is no more
I have survived
And used
Your poison
To heal
And set me free.

And
Never again
Will I
Let another
Poison me.





Sent from my iPhone

Align with Your Design

Align with your true design,
Anchor on the truth you feel..

Feeling is the prayer and what is really real.

Transformation & authenticity

Anchor yourself on your own vibrations explicitly

It's the only way to love and serve and remain whole.

Sun light
Soul light
Guide yourself
By what feels right

Fully accept reality
Eliminate duplicity

Let go of the old

Recognize synchronicity
Dance with it as it unfolds

Co-create
Don't re-create..the past

Forgive from within
Let go of hate
Fear only brings more of the same
Clear out all the dusty corners of the brain

Throw open the shutters
And drink in the light

Manifest your own truth
Only what feels freeing and right

Love and worth are abundant
Joy and beauty are abundant
And they come from the space within..


Sent from my iPhone

The Hand Pointing to the Moon is Not the Moon

"The hand pointing to the moon is not the moon." ~ Buddhist saying

Our teachers, styles, and even religions, with the best of intensions and rich pearls of wisdom, still show only one perspective, one view, one of the many paths to awakening.

Many students, practitioners and followers make the mistake of clinging to the path so tightly, that they miss the actual experience the path is aiming to lead them into.  They become so attached to the rituals of the path themselves, that those lose their purpose, and become stiff dogmatic containers and walls to create false divisions between "right" and "wrong" and "them" and "us". The stare at the path itself instead of looking out at the majestic views the path affords. Some will become so narrow and fearful that they will punish others for not walking the identical pathway.

All religions, all styles of meditation and yoga, are not the luminous moon of the ever-unfolding Divine Consciousness that dwells in all things. They are helpful hands pointing to the moon. Let your awareness guide you, as you choose the best of what you discover, and keep using what is working to make you feel luminous, blessed, light, loving, wise and joyous. Use it in conjunction with whatever gems work for you. And when they cease to work as you grow and change, let them go.

Who are we to imagine that the Consciousness Within All is to be accessible by only one mean? Just by the sheer fact of diversity in this world, it leads one to believe that many, many, many effective ways exist to realization. It is said that there are as many paths as beings that exist. Maybe there are even more.

Go experience the moon. Stop obsessing about the hand.

With love and light for all beings~

Bust Down Those Walls

Bust Down Those Walls
by Laura Harrison


Bust those walls down, baby!

The faster the walls crash down,
 the sooner you become totally free!!!

Open your heart wider in the face of fear, pain, confusion,
Grow your heart large enough to
Swallow your reality.

Destroy the delusion,
and you will grow brighter, freer, and wiser..
To close is to resist,
to resist is to die.
If you close, the pain
and the darkness will only remain.

You are here to live,
free from the reign
of self-consciousness and fear,
in real happiness and love.
No one is here to live a lie.
You should live your Truth,
and let the self-consciousness die.

At Peace With the Unknown

At Peace with the Unknown

Laura Harrison



I am torn, broken down, tormented,

my pathway.. unrelented..

beaten into letting go,     of ideas   of knowing

..the wear and fatigue are showing

I cannot know how life will go.



Just pick a direction, and trust the flow
and know
          that if you listen to your heart

every single moment is your fresh start.

although we are constantly gushing

into a great unknown..

it isn't aimless, it isn't cruel-

in fact,    it's creating

a fairy-tale through you,    the story

of your purpose,

your bliss,

of all,

past lifetimes,

creating This.


Dive through your passion,
live your purpose,
be bold

color it with compassion,
Let go of the old

views
and
ways
 of life.

The unknown is alright, and its al that we know.

Following our bliss, we all learn as we go.

Learning Where to Put the Love

I learned a hard lesson, finally, or at least, I can see the answer, and can now apply my mindfulness to manifesting the solution.

Unconditional love and genuine enthusiasm and caring for other beings is a beautiful thing, and an awesome responsibility. Just like a Teacher needs to learn to give each student only what they are ready for, too much will overwhelm them, so too much a Lover understand that the full-force of Love is overwhelming. Being blunt, I have not only overwhelmed people, I have frightened them, shut them down and sent them running. All because I appreciated them too much.

People aren't used to receiving Love without attachment, most people don't know what this means, and their minds cannot fathom a love that is unselfish and okay with whatever reality may bring, even parting. They look for an agenda, or they think I must be insane. Or they don't love themselves, and can't see why I do and reject it and me. Its sad. But it is reality, and it is a crucial lesson for me that I am glad I am embracing. I pledged years ago to rise to each opportunity to express my love and appreciation in the moment I feel it, because life is unpredictable,and nothing is static- it is NOT a given that we will have people in our lives for more then a flash. I even tell strangers on the street how beautiful they are, or how much I appreciate their unique style. And I try to let my loved ones know my gratitude each time we meet and part. Part of my learning lately has been that I must be my Self completely, no matter what happens, the ego has to go and I am here to shine, love, serve, and play. Its not that I will hide my Love and Light, but that I will try to only express the bit each person can handle to them, and let the rest nourish me and pour out through my every glance, breath, and action. When will I remember that they are not the source of love! I know this... Its the urge to pay it back that is the problem, I must pay it FORWARD!!! Just like if we want to help someone, we must help them in the way they need to be helped, not the way that we prefer, we can only give someone as much love as they can handle, and maybe a little more, when someone's heart is ready to break wide open to receive more love... But we cannot give someone who can only drink a glass of water an endless waterfall when they are not prepared for its force, its raw intensity, its power.  Unconditional Love IS that strong. That's what my energy feels like.. When I don't hold it back or waste it, but practice Self-care and simple grounding techniques, and just BE ME naturally, its like the Niagara Falls of sensation, appreciation, inspiration, and love is flowing through me. I am BLESSED, I'm not complaining! But I am grateful I am finally learning consciously how to balance and channel that into this world in a way that is not like spraying people with fire hoses. Once people's vibrations rise or they acclimate to the intensity, they can thrive with that Love both flowing out of them, and back into them... Love is the most important nutriment that too many people are starving for.
May all beings find the Love in their own hearts, and fall in love with Life Itself, the Divine within ALL that is.

The Loneliness On The Spiritual Path, Finding Your Tribe, Happiness and Real Love

The Loneliness On The Spiritual Path, Finding Your Tribe, Happiness and Real Love NOVEMBER 2012 "Happiness is not something ready made. It comes from your own actions." ~ Dalai Lama

"I have found the paradox, that if you love until it hurts, there can be no more hurt, only more love." ~Mother Teresa

"Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony." ~ Mahatma Gandhi

"Immature love says: 'I love you because I need you.' Mature love says 'I need you because I love you.'" ~Erich Fromm

"Love is a force more formidable than any other. It is invisible - it cannot be seen or measured, yet it is powerful enough to transform you in a moment, and offer you more joy than any material possession could." ~Barbara de Angelis

"Normal" lifestyle according to American pop culture is based on the material level of life alone. It is devoid of genuine heartfelt variation, uniqueness, self-expression and real spirituality. It supports people being trapped in their own heads and traumatized and imprisoned with self-consciousness and the ego running rampant, comparing self to others constantly trying to rank and compete and fit in and appease. This is not heart-centered, authentic or as Jeff Brown calls it, Soul-centered, living. It is fake and negates deep honesty and authenticity, which then defies any real happiness, confidence, or fulfilment in living.

Living life in harmony with your inner truth leads to much deeper and realer fulfilment in life- it is discovering your life purpose and giving yourself to it; it is living a lifestyle that brings out your best, makes you feel your best and shine your brightest as much as possible. However, there is a price to pay for authenticity: all the people, foods, places, actions, thoughts, and habits that aren't harmonious with who you become at each stage of spiritual growth must be shed. Letting go of friends, ways of life, old ideas, can be VERY painful. And there is a time in between when you lost the old nouns and verbs that don't fit right or fulfil you anymore and when the new people, places, and things fill your life... and this time is usually a swirling cycle of bright and amazing experiences, and dark cold, lonely times when you wish you could find people and a society that you fit in with.

This time period is different for everyone, and this transitional space comes not just once, but every so often on the spiritual journey, as vibrations change, that which resonates harmoniously changes too. These times are very trying. Why do we have to go through this, as beings aiming to live positive and grateful lives? Devo Mahesvara.. the difficulty helps us to discard that which is no longer serving our good. It is the time for trial-and-error, a lot of learning, a lot of exploring what is meaningful and inspiring to you... and as you hold in your heart the vibrations you now embody, the energy of who you are and are becoming, as you live it and explore it.. you are attracting towards you the people and places and experiences that will nourish you. You are attracting your authentic life and your tribe.

Teacher Jeff Brown calls it a "soul pod" like a family of dolphins, connected by past lives, similar vibrations, and/or similar levels of consciousness. These are the people who "get" you, who view life in compatible ways, enjoy the sames sorts of things, disassociate from most of the same parts of conventional society as you. They become your brothers and sisters. They become soul-friends, and soul-mates, partners in crime, best friends, inspirations, support, mirrors, and they UPLIFT you, they do not DRAIN you.
I have had times of extreme loneliness, when I was learning to live an authentic lifestyle based on my own heart-compass, but I knew no one that I connected with. I was so sad, so confused, I thought there had to be something wrong with me, I mean, I wasn't like anyone else. I was happy with who I was except for the fact that I was extremely alone. So I developed a handy little eating disorder to deal with my sensitivity to energy and it was a horrible, painful cycle. Yoga slowly pulled me out of it and towards other beings as I continued on a heart-centered path. The loneliness pops up sometimes, especially I find that changing eating habits tends to lead to a feeling of disconnetion from others.. so becoming raw vegan from regular vegan made me feel much more alone and unalike anything "normal". I didn't want to be "normal", but we all want to have loved ones that love us and that we can love and feel part of... real family.


Another amazing side-effect of these periods of loneliness, I am discovering as I am coming into a new time of connection, is to learn greater and greater capacities for giving and receiving love. I am becoming extraordinarily open with my appreciation and adoration and love for the people who contribute to my world. This ability to appreciate SO thoroughly is directly connected to the pain suffered in times of loneliness.. If I wasn't THAT painfully lonely I would take this gratitude and love for granted or think nothing of it, or not even notice it well. It is in times of suffering that the heart is broken, and instead of letting it heal smaller and harder, like conventional wisdom would have us do, the yogi lets it heal wider, wide enough to swallow the sorrow. It breaks wide open and we let it heal large and open and more sensitive. And that is how we feel greater and greater love, joy, gratitude, satisfaction and fulfilment in life. All the things that were keeping our hearts small are broken through and transcended. Our capacity grows. Not just for love, but for intensity in general, for life in general, for joy, sorrow, peace, PRESENCE, our capacity to be fully present grows.

So even if you feel like you know no one anything like you, just keep folowing the things that make you happy, that uplift, inspire, enliven, the things that stoke your passion, your creativity, your fulfilment.. and you will find your tribe, your chosen family, and you will know you are loved and magnificent. You may have felt that way before, but the validation and the mirror of your beauty in the hearts of others you love and respect is a nourishment that we all need. And it shall come! Blessings!!!

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Stronger and With A New Song

 

Stronger and with a new songby Laura Harrison


All spinning on our own paths, I see that you are busy,
I understand that fully, but when I do talk to you I'm dizzy,

When we first met I couldn't see, but I see now it is the lack of truth in your touch,
I don't know that it is even conscious, or if you even feel that much.


Once again I feel alone, but it is mostly my own fault,
because I put my faith in other's actions, instead of in the present by default.

I told myself stories dressed in others' clothes,
it was my own mind that turned the yes's to no's.

That is part of this result, but I didn't create it all,
I can feel what is felt and upspoken, and THAT started the thought-squawl.


you never said you were good for me, I just hoped that you'd be,
but once again my ideas were wrong, but yet not too distant from reality.


When my image of what I had fades and reality sets in like stone,
I feel sobered, and embarassed, and I want to find my way home.

Yet I can't be so hard upon myself, because this is the process,
waking up takes time and patience, dilligence and forgiveness.

And just because it didn't mean what I wanted it to,
doesn't mean what it actually was wasn't true..
it wasn't a mistake to think too much of you.

If I wasn't so taken, mistaken, shaken,
If I didn't let my heart break then,
I wouldn't have been opened up, wouldn't have grown.

I wouldn't have been shown,
and never would have known,
I would still suffer believing in that lie. 

As the falsities crash, shatter like glass,
There is a hot, stinging slap to my heart,

A dark vaccuum in my chest,
a deep and painful unrest,
but when the tears dry, I am freer and I,
see clearer then ever before.
Sadness leaves, and happiness returns to my door. 

The sun shines brighter,
and I am so much lighter,
and so I continue on...

Stronger and with a new song.