Tuesday, January 28, 2014

Finally Seen

Old lady moon, won't you lend me your ear??

I'm dying,
I'm dying!
My old life's disappeared-


And I'll tell you the truth, I carry no fear...

I'm floating,
I'm floating.
Become atmosphere.

I spent my life knowing that I was just a star on ground,

I'm shining,
I'm shining.
But no one's around.

If nobody watches and you never feel found,

I'm beautiful,
beautiful!?
Does it still make a sound??


Now old lady moon, I never grew numb...

I'm vibrant,
I'm vibrant.
Refuse to succumb.


I danced and I flitted, and stayed true to me,

I'm happy,
I'm happy,
And totally free.

But sometimes is cry in my pillow at night,

I'm longing,
I'm longing,
To share this sweet light.

I'm seen from the outside and pieces are known,

I'm intricate,
Intricate.
Deeper than shown.


I'm a quiet kind of beauty not readily seen,

The unconscious,
Unconscious
Can't appreciate me.


I'm not living a life from the physical side,

I'm starlight,
Just starlight
On a physical ride.

I love my own magic and make my sun,

Independent,
Independent.
Life is my fun.

But old mother moon, I know that's it's natural to be paired,

Happiness,
Happiness.
Is More complete when it's shared.


But I couldn't dispense with myself to
Less worthy man,

Can't settle,
Won't settle,
For less than I am.

An equal of mine must be an extraordinary sight,

A diamond,
A diamond,
Radiates his own light.

And such an exceptional one must be rare to sure,

Brilliant
Sheer genius
& A heart that is pure.

----

Now grandmother moon I thought it'd take years,
But I felt him coming and pushed past my fears,
I purified my energy and cried many tears,
And all of a sudden it seems he's appeared.

----

So now grandmother moon you've revealed him to me,

Poetry,
Poetry,
Grateful eternally.

I began a new life and now he is here,

I've died to
Died to it
All's disappeared


Finally the life that I have is the one I create

I'm blooming
I'm flying
And no longer wait.
....


My life is my own and based on my soul

I'm honest
I'm honest
Refused to fit into the mold

And..

My intricate radiance isn't wasted on he

I'm treasured
I'm treasured
And finally seen

Monday, January 27, 2014

Never Settle

I want to get down on my hands and knees
and put my head to the earth
Crying happy tears,
Crying thank you, and please!!
For in all of my searching no man has seen my worth

But you

You do
-


For all I have given
I have never been seen
I've been sought, taken and forsaken
One too many times
And I refused to abide

I didn't make the rules to game
But I took the reigns
And sent them away
-I no longer wanted to play


Worthless sentiments
And condescending compliments
Walking on eggshells
Men with no honor
Patting me on the head
Empty heads, lights out,
Checked out, soul hidden behind a wall
Doesn't matter what that soul looks like
If they choose to bury it behind brick and mortar
In a basement, dingy dark and stairs steep
It's they who choose to sleep
Refuse to keep
Integrity

They made me sick
They made me tired
But I forced myself at the worst of times
To never abandon my desire..
For what I deserve

I may have stayed longer than I should've
But I did know how to let it go

I fought with everything to preserve
My sanctity
My faith
In my own heart
And in life

And I have won
-

So to you all
I say

When you are the most sick and tired,
When you no longer wish to play

Walk away.
And hold on...

Not to the users, the abusers
Weak-willed & hypocritical
Living in hypotheticals
Taking
Draining you

Love is not love
That suffocates

Do not negate
Your value
For a half-manifestation
Close but no cigar
You've come too far
In your life
To resign to tolerate
Horrible treatment
Don't settle.

Walk away
And hold on.

Never settle.

I'd rather sleep alone
Than with a poser or a prick
People pretending to be so conscious
Afraid to look in the mirror
They make me sick

Don't waste your time
With one who refuses to grow
And you had better face the mirror
Face the music
Do the work
Walk your talk

Strive to uphold your integrity
Live your life, follow your inspirations
And don't worry

And never settle..
And your day will come..

One
Worthy
Of
Your love.

Sunday, January 26, 2014

Where You Long To Be

Do you listen to my poem
Of rapture
And love
And think me naive?

But have you heard
How much
and far
I have been torn apart!?

Maturity is not marked
In smart, cynical
Remarks
In disdain
Or hardness..

I am not vain,
I crawled across hot coals
And travelled endlessly
Scoured out my insides
To stop hating myself
And find peace

I am not sheltered
I have known pain
The secret is that those who have suffered most
Can feel the most release

Don't cling to the shroud of your melancholy
Keep it as a souvenir on your shelf
Don't let it dampen your enjoyment
Keep it small
Just a token
To recall
That this is all scared and fleeting
Let your feelings be spoken
Or they will pass away
Never throw away
The preciousness of a day

Some are high, some are gray
Some are like reggae
Some blues
Pay your dues
And then stop paying
Always keep playing

And don't think yourself
Ever to be above falling in love

It's not the weak who love fully
But the strong..
The flimsy turn their backs and run
The brave stand and face the wave
And let the deluge swallow and transform
Transcend
Mere physical form

You are better than your spiteful jealousy
Don't let your words savor of such bitter wounds
Why do you lash out at those who have gone
Where you long to be??

Don't shoot the messenger
Stop whining
Stop letting scars be defining
And walk
Somewhere
Any direction
Away from where it's misery to be
As long as it's not toxic
And it somehow sets you free
any direction may take you
Where you long to be

Meet Me In Between

My brain and body have finally
Caught up to my soul
Which has loved you
I suspect always
And has even caused the symptoms
Of love
Which I did not see
Until my brain was ready

I already know that I love you
With all of me
So slowly
Show me
All of the causes
For my love
And manifestations
Of that soul
I so love
As it trickles through the facets of your mind and form

Quiet still nights
With the echoes of trains
Let the others sleep
Let them have their normality
As we cannot settle for that

And I will meet you in the center
Of everything
As you are of the night
And I of the day
We are just the same,
And of complimentary
Corresponding colors,
The same and yet not at all
Yet brighter
Together
Than ever
Alone

Somehow I breathe easier
Stand taller
Dance lighter of foot
Smile brighter
Love deeper
Sing truer
I am simply more alive
Because of you

And we will meet in the center
Of ourselves and all opposites

I was whole without you
I found boundless joy and was alive all alone
Just the sky and I
But the sky couldn't hold me
The trees couldn't speak
And your mind is as fascinating as the stars
And as ancient

So let me unfold you
Slowly
And see me
As soul
Dancing in the kitchen
Soul upholding
Physical form
Your chef
And sweet goddess

And let me see you
And how you work
In the world of form
Let me know this soul
I already love so

And I will give you all of me
When I meet you in the center
The Inbetween
The balance of all opposites,
Dawn and dusk
Equinoxes
After all,
You are a libra
And I am the flowing, never-ending waters
Of love and enraptured synchronicity

And I love you
Boundlessly
From far beyond just me
Meet me
Sweet love
In between.

I Choose Loving You

For you
I will go to the edges of my mind
And let my ego show itself
In resistance
And I will wrestle it down and force it out

For you
In fact I see you being a light by which I better see
What is and isn't me

So for you
I will go to war inside my mind
When it produces an assault on our love
As minds tend to do with the familiar
And love will be made safe

I choose loving you
Because the work I will do
To keep it flourishing
Is the very same work I would do with out
To keep evolving anyhow
And sharing my soul & beauty & joy
With the one man I have ever found
That can appreciate every detail of me
Is something sacred and worthy
And deserves nurturing & protecting

Saturday, January 25, 2014

The Only Man Who Could Deserve Me

I can handle the sweet and subtle agony of longing for you,

Like a fire lashing at me from the inside,

Love for you,
Or just a thought
or sight of an object,
triggering a cascade of nostalgia
Pouring through my body
Like tiny pebbles stinging me
And the slight descending sadness resulting from
Each point of contact

I can handle the agony of missing
Of mother torn from child
When my son returns to his father
And I know
Truly what it is to ache

Now you
Finally I meet you in the flesh
Though I've longed for you
For so long
Before I knew you
Were the one who
I longed for

And we knew
We have known
Each other before
But Never more
Has this space
Between us
Been set on fire
Like it assaults my being
As if I'm lying on my bed
Longing for you
To take me
But you're not here
Not abandoning me
You are busy
This writhing is healthy

My son taught me
First
That we have to miss
The ones we love most
Though I knew it long ago
He made me accountable
To sanctify
And protect
The one relationship
I can and will never leave
The one
Between him and me

And who would've thought
He'd prepare me for this?
That, by God,
And everything seen
And unseen
That I never knew
You would come to mean
This much to me,
And upon my word,
Me to you.

This.

This is what people starve to death waiting for..

Souls starve when they aren't seen,
Hidden in their flesh,
Like a jewel in a temple,
Praying, dreaming, begging,
To be set free.

Merely Seeing another's soul can be enough,
And All it needs
To shine and live on
In another day of drudgery

I am not starving any longer,
I feast
When I see you see me,
And one day
Perhaps
I will end every night worshipping
the One Soul
Reflected in your one soul
My body
Pouring vast love
Through longing fingers
And lips
The Universe Itself
Loving you through me

Until that day
I am no child
I am wise

And I have learned that love requires sacrifice

So I will make sure
To break my own heart
Just a little
Over and over
As I do for my son
To be the mother he deserves
And I will do it for you
Because though this love may fade
I will do everything in my power to
Keep it alive
To set it ablaze, to make it thrive..

So I will break my heart
Just a little
Everyday
To keep this torrent of love flowing
It takes a subtle stream of melancholy
A small sacrifice
To protect the sanctity
Of this precious bond given to you and me


But tell me,
my love,
tonight,

When you are without me,
When you lie down,
And shut off the light,

close your eyes,
let yourself be still,
and breathe deeply,

So ....slowly,

like you would if I were near,

and in your mind & senses
Imagine me there-
recall
the feel of my skin,
My playful laughter,
& Incandescent smiles,
As my eyes
see into your soul...

And
Now open your eyes
Know I am far,
& read these words,
that caress your divine consciousness,

And
tell me,
What does your soul say?
Do you merely 'think' you love me?

Tell me, does your soul rattle the walls of your body,
Is it longing for me??

Oh, you are no fool.
You know what you did by being busy tonight.
You know exactly what you've done to me,
And that
Is exactly why
You are the only man who can
Possibly deserve me.

I, too, am no fool,
I know that if I'm on fire
So are you
And I
Will
Gently
Resist
And
Make
You
Take
Me
First
Again.

Friday, January 17, 2014

Revealed By The Light Of the Moon

Pretty lady, full moon
Keeping me awake
Intensity, immensity,
That I can hardly take!
Was it your design,
To leave behind,
New feelings in your wake?


Mysteries
Can be misery
Commiserate,
Or far better
To Correlate.
Seeing Patterns liberates,
Consciousness Consecrates,
Understanding provides relief.


Full moon, mother,
You bring powerful sleepless nights,
And fight your wisdom,
I will not.


I am not in the practice of fighting the tides...
And full moon lady I will not hide.


Wake me out of a sound night's sleep,
Reminding me of promises that I shall keep,
Shining light on the places dark and deep,
Moon mother stir my soul.


Pretty lady, full moon
Silent sage,
Inspire, conspire,
Sweet dewey light.
What you reveal,
Day can no longer conceal,
Tell me it was always your plan!?


Once we look inside..
We can no longer hide..
From what is revealed by the light of the moon.

Manifestation

Consider now, sweet one,

What is it that you truly want?

What life do you feel fit for,

What life is truly yours, worthy of your soul?

-

What do you feel, when you close your eyes?

What do you truly desire?

What pulls at your soul like gravity,
And sends tremors to your bones?

What pulls at you, like your heart will burst out?

What excites you, rouses you from a dead sleep, with lightning coursing through your veins?

That which sustains
Is not so much the sustenance of food
But the ambrosia of love and inspiration...

Life is worthless without love,
Without creativity,
Without the dance of energies,
Without synchronicity...

No fortune can buy true inner peace.

-

So what can you not live without?

What tears at your heart, makes you brave enough to banish doubt?

What makes you love so passionately that risk is undaunting?

-

Prayer is not the cardboard, faithless lip-service most pay

But the feelings you allow to play

Within your own heart and mind

So if you fear freedom,
Fear success,
Self-sabotage,
That is the life you'll find.

-

Prayer is not the words you speak,

But the passions you seek

Through the visceral feelings you keep.

Mind the feelings you allow to permeate

Don't allow those that deviate

From the reality you seek to create.

-

Fears, deprived of your energy, will begin to dissipate

So mind what you provide harbor,

It will become your home.

Feel the full passion of your inspirations,

Build your life upon that foundation.

Saturday, January 4, 2014

Come To Me

I feel you even though I don't know you
Like a whisper is the breeze
Concealed by more conscious forces
With which I've been introduced
But you're just as true

I feel your existence and know you will make an entrance
Though I don't know how or when
But I know perhaps where
And that you will enter

Like the sliver of the moon
I feel you
And I cannot sleep
With such brilliance about
I feel you growing near
Like the moon grows full
I have no doubt
In your existence
I offer no resistance

Several have had the chance
To be where you will be
But I have a strong feeling that
You will be the one that doesn't fail me

There comes a time
When we meet our match
And I am woman enough to let you chase me
And if you are worthy, I'll let you catch
When I fall
If you are worthy, you will catch me

I'm happy without you
But I feel you everyday, everywhere
And I can already imagine
The feeling, the way, your awe-inflicted stare

you will peruse me
Convince me
Make me fall
Make me see

God knows I will not settle
And I will not stand
For less than I deserve
Find me, take my hand

Be brave and bold
Unafraid of deep love
Or at least man enough
To tell me your fears as well as that of which you dream

If you do not feel breathlessly
That I am everything
You could wish for or want
Then you are not he

If you do not lose yourself
When you look in my eyes
If you do not fall hopelessly
Enchantingly effervescently
Incandescently
In love
Please
Do not apply
You cannot be the guy

You must love me unimaginably
Epically
Beyond all fears
Ecstatically
Feel that I am the most fascinating gorgeous graceful flower
Upon the face of this earth
Or else this is not what we deserve
We are all of that worth

And I promise
O sir, of unbelievable charm
Your precious heart
In my hands
Won't come to harm

You must challenge me
Allow me to grow
Let your endless love and appreciation show
And remain a free man
Of his own independent choices and strength
And I will love you unfathomably
Intimately and at length
You and I will be as free people
Living their truth as they see
And choosing
In freedom
Each other tenderly
I will appreciate you
Treat you as a king
Tell you only truth
Reflect to you your greatness
And give you everything
I have to give
Mind, body and soul
My truth
Will be
Loving you boundlessly
My life is my spiritual journey
And my spiritual journey
Is to love
Above all else
to Love


I don't know you yet
We haven't met
But I feel you already
Wherever you are
Come to me