Sunday, December 22, 2013

Ode To Fact

Just because I can let go
Doesn't mean the truth doesn't show
Just because I shouldn't be in my head
Doesn't mean the energy isn't being read

It just means I can let it go and be at peace
The present moment sets me free
And we have some things about which to speak
But I need not let it worry me

Oh reality
Thick and deep
Filled with love
And intensity
Nigh agony
Under which I could let myself sink
But I will choose to float

Reality, reality,
Preference has nothing to do with thee
I have to choose what it is you bring
That's what I'm discovering
But I can turn my mood around
There's great power in that I've also found

Oh reality
Thick and deep
Filled with love
And intensity
Brutal, almost agony
Under which I could let myself sink
But I will choose to float

I'll take this heart and take this light
And I acknowledge my feelings tonight
But I will believe in what I see
Which says that I am always free
So if you want me, come to me,
Or through unknown the trust will breech
Let me in, with well-placed speech
Needn't be many words, but a crucial few
Open to me and I'll give everything to you.

The Need For Communication

Silent agony
Underneath the sky
Each day lasts for days and I can't lie
Taking me to the edge of my sky
Endless eons lived in every day
But lightness returns when you make your play
Until then..
Like a glacier scraping through my heart and head
With a deep scouring occurring, nothing said
Evolution occurs and I'm forced to let go
Over and over this is the show

I can stand in my feet and so I do
I was not planning to depend on you
Too many times it's come true
You're not the rug in standing on..
Or else I can bet it'd soon be gone

Wonder, wonder, upon a star
I'm happy within and come so far
But what's this pattern going on
Is my desire for response all too wrong?

Desire, no, it's fair enough,
But Expectations are brutal stuff,
And when, and when, they're not fulfilled,
That is when my heart is spilled.
I'm high above so I won't crash,
But this edgy silence stirs backlash.
Your Silence is forcing growth but creating instability,
And a paradigm of doubting that you fully want me.

Time isn't much but it's ancient and vast,
It's only been days but I feel the contrast,
To witnessing, witnessing your rhythms and flows,
And openly seeing how everything goes.

You're an angel and of that there is not doubt,
And I had to let the pressure out.
I cannot level an offense at you,
& I do not doubt that you are true.
But I feel maybe my place is not in your heart
Us not as One as it seems at every start

And then by now I come to bed
And see that this may be just my head
But I'm not wrong, I feel it all,
But I also don't need to fall.

So exhale, exhale once again,
Trust you, trust me, and transcend.

It's not easy with such empathy,
Connected to one who prefers to be a mystery.
A couple sentences each day are not too much,
A tiny price to own my touch,
A simple way to grant me peace,

It's not my head, it is my heart,
A choice must be made to make a start,
Still resisting sharing with me your heart,
I'll hold the space but you must light the dark.

Monday, December 9, 2013

And Then the Moment Passes

I feel so much,
Feelings layered so richly
I cannot differentiate
I cannot anticipate
Like an ocean 
With diverse currents
Rocking me with a gentle rhythm
But with force

Of course, 
I want to scream,
Because it's so much.
It's not bad,
It's not pain,
But so much,
It bears a tinge of agony.
It's just so much
I want to put my soul to it
Just to touch
The face of God emerging
In this submerging,
Pushing my head underneath
Waters I no longer struggle against

I ride the high
Of love
I need no one to make me 
fall in love 
when I know 
my home is within 
My own hearts glow
No where to fall 
After all.
Shining smiling love light
And complete

If we don't ride the wave
While it's high
Say goodbye 
Because you are heading for another shore 
don't ignore your passion
Don't try and play it cool
Keep in fashion
With the numb masses..
Let yourself be what 
Inner urgency presses forth
Let it be, Let it out, 
Ecstasy, cast off the doubt,
Shout your love,
Praise the beauty you see,
Because everything is divine,
My chapel is this planet 
The moment is now 
And my worship is to bow 
to the Soul
Within all
My place is to hold the mirror 
To show & praise divinity
Sacred, playful, miraculous
Rustic and refined 
Show through very face
And place
I find

Let your life be redefined
By your heart-truth
Your freedom 
becomes living proof

Fate reroutes 
when we miss the turn
When our faith 
in the inner voice fails 
it patiently arises again 
and again 
Enticing us to believe
Never judging
Never less than loving
Sweet, smiling love-light
Melting us out 
of our futile fight
Of the flow

But THIS is the moment
So give praise when you feel it arise
Do not swallow it under pride
Too proud to bow at the feet of a stranger
To tell them they are a gem
Hold a mirror up to them.
To tell them of their good
Is to thank God
And to bless them
Support them
Is to know you are
Holy beings

Never be so imprisoned
That you give up your chance
To be Divinity loving Divinity
In every form

Never conform for fear
Because one single entity 
Chose to manifest multiplicity
For a reason--

This life is your cathedral 
And we are here 
To assist each other 
In awakening

Some throw rocks
Others make love
Some give smiles
Hold doors
Offer compliments
Share sentiments 
Our sentience
Our purpose

And no moment will ever come again
Offer what arises
From the well-spring of your heart

Don't deny
Don't edit
Don't filter
Don't be afraid to fly

Each moment designed
To be born, grow
Pass away and die

So when the moment passes
Another will arise
But you'll never have the same chance twice
Stay open 
Heart, mind and eyes
To be the voice
Of the Divine

Wednesday, November 27, 2013

Agony Births Ecstasy

Moods, emotions,
Like waves in the ocean
Come and go
Pulled and pushed 
By unseen forces

But hold tight
Shine on
Let go
Don't you know?

You are not the storms
That assault you
You are not the clutter
In your brain
You are not this flesh
That will become 

So take heed,
Have peace
You are the 
Glow of the moon
The shine of the sun
You are The One
This dance
This drama
This destiny

You are not alone
No matter how much 
Your heart aches
Down to your bones
Tearing at your soul
This pain cannot tarnish
Your never-ending love-light
So don't fight
This pain
Tearing everything
Peeling back the layers 
Tearing it all away
Every place you used to hide
This path is not for the faint
Exposing every detail
Of your humanness 
Enjoy the ride

Because for every freshly exposed layer of skin 
Burning as it faces the light
You step closer to a level of ecstasy that few fathom
Fewer accomplish
When outer life and inner light
Are one

The waves of agony
Are the pangs of contraction 
Giving birth to expanded consciousness & sacred action
You are the expansion of the universe
You are the destruction of worlds
You are the conductor of holy light
Giving dimension and meaning 
To the world
By witnessing miracles 

So when you are in the depths
Of agony
Repeat after me:

I am not this sorrow
I am not this pain
This hurt is beckoning me
To accept reality
Open my heart
And seek the light of joy
Happiness radiates
From the light pouring through my eyes
This pain is just the removal 
Of the disguise 

I will not hide
I will not run
I am the loving witness
The warm light of the sun

Sunday, November 24, 2013

My Light and Love

This love and light that I am
Is like glass
Is like light itself pouring at the one receiving it

And this loving-light can be bright
Like a mirror
Sometimes it's a harsh experience
To be exposed
To be held accountable
Because this mirror reflects
A level of truth
Most humans never wish to know
The level of truth
That is where we are all going

And to the one seeing their reflection in the words and eyes of the mirror

It can reveal that with which they struggle most within

That which they maybe wished was hidden

All the details of your skin you wish were a secret
The imperfections, the lines

All the things you don't know how to accept

Or love
Or change
Or face
(The fears, the patterns, the times you wish to disappear)

& Yet

This mirror offers no judgement
In the brightness of the light
In the stark exposure of your defects
This mirror doesn't begrudge
Never thinks less
In fact only more

It caresses your humanity
With it's light
Filled with love
Unconditional love

Because this mirror
Has battled
Still has it's struggles
Still grows clearer
By it's own striving
Still aches
But just less than it used to
And with the peace of tested & proven faith

And it shows you what you have to look forward to
The reward of your agonizing work
As a human stepping into it's greatness and divinity

And i am still learning
So it seems
For the men closest to me
How to be true to my force
Like the ocean
Like the sun and moon
Like a wave
Like a mirror
Pouring light
Accepting no degree of falsity
And still not harm them as I scrub off their shells, as I expose their fragility

To me
Your vulnerability
Is filled with beauty
As much as your strength
Perhaps even more

I only want to let you know
You are loved
By my seeing
And I stand to empower
your magnificence
Because it is all I see within you
Shining back at me
Light meeting light
Mirrors reflecting souls
And like mirrors do
Amplify the light
Greater than separately

I am not daunted by the details you call defects
Or wish to remain anonymous within
I see you as a spiritual warrior,
Being of light
But maybe in the power
And intensity
Of my light and of my love
It is an unknown force
Hard to understand

The combination is not what mere mortals tend to enjoy
Or expect
Or have the willingness to withstand

I must be authentic
I am this mirror
I want my equal mirror
To unabashedly expose me
With omniscient love
Within the light
And for us to support each other's transcendence of mortality
Into the realm of divinity

Equal partners are always equal
Not by refusing to be vulnerable
Or putting on airs
Or hoisting walls of safety
But by knowing
their wholeness and strength isn't compromised
By flowing
with the need
To lean into the other &
work out spiritual growth together
Share the burden
Shine two lights and expose solution faster

Sometimes you'll lean into my arms,
And I will stroke your hair and
pouring limitless undying love
over you like honey
Make the harshness of this lesson, this moment love meditation

Or loving you enough to grant you sabbatical, if you need to climb the Mount Everest within alone, this is not unknown and upon that, from the distance, my light can be shone

And at times I will certainly need you to hold me,
cradle me,
surround my fragility
with the strength of your flesh and your ancient soul..
just hold me
and let me silently heal the subtle remnants of wounds from when I didn't have you..
Many years of needing to be held with no arms,
No light to see mine,
Or reflect my love,
did leave behind harm..

And typically, we'll dance,
create, escalate
into exponentially
higher realms of consciousness than we ever reached
before and much faster
and more freely
than we could have
If you and me
Weren't mirrors for each other's souls
For each other's greatness
For each other's truth
Pouring love and light
Like the sun
Over each other
Like a blessing
Like a prayer
Like divinity itself
Like the air
The life and beauty it surrounds
So gently
But so powerfully

Equal footing
Sharing the burden
Catalyzing the destruction and creation of universes within each other
And allowing space for all we need
And together

I will never again allow
Anything less than a sacred relationship

Please know
That although I expose
In the mirror
Of my heart
You are never nothing less than sacred to me
And I would love you as my spiritual practice
To grow brighter
By honoring you
And fighting the battle
To release all fear
And let love create my reality
Kiss you
Cascade my love and unending reverence upon you
Leaving divine light on your skin
And treasure you for everything that makes you
Divinely human
And unique

Saturday, November 23, 2013

Let Go.

I can let go
Of anything
Witness the wonder
And I have seen
Countless times
When my world
Has crumbled
And turned to ash
And still
Better came
And I was glad
That my heart
Was torn out of my chest
I have no reason to doubt
But just as each
is better
than the last
This time
It was so sacred
That letting go
Is like destroying
My entire universe twice
And although I still
Must let you go completely
I have resisted
As long as possible
Not because I fear my path
Or lack faith
But because
Of the incredible circumstances
Under which we celebrated
Our union
Miracle upon miracle
And I now am embarrassed
Because I've outstayed my welcome
I have more dignity than this
I know better
I trust the universe
You'll come get me if you want me
And if you don't want me
So be it
The universe will bring better
I have faith
And know it will be so
Even if I myself can't fathom better
So here it is
I can't hold on anymore
And I'm being childish anyhow
So at the count of three
You become neutral to me
And I have no more right to remember you
And you don't exist
Until I heal
I'm sorry it took so long
You were my favorite
But I know better than all this
Much better

Wednesday, November 20, 2013

Hold The Space For You

I know you're hurting,
Writhing under your calm exterior
Confusion under your usual knowing
Barely showing
what you're really feeling
Silently enduring
In the middle
Of a big transition
Even gurus
Go through
Because we are all divine
And all human too

I know how it feels, baby
I feel it too.
I'm in the middle of my own.
What if I say
These sweet words to you?...

It doesn't matter
if you don't know who you are
All the love you feel
Even the pain,
The light that shines through you
Is the light of ancient stars

You don't need to say a word
And I will understand
Whether or not you want
to hold my hand
I will hold the space for you
Silently shine my love on you
No attachment to what you find is true
Just holding the space in love and light for you

If you don't know right now
Who you are and what you feel
I can step back quietly
And let you watch it be revealed

doesn't often catch up
to people like you and me
Because we are usually the guides
But teacher is a role
I know you know
That role is often turned
But you know how
To maintain peace
So that your inner disintegration
Can't be discerned
You can feel
More than most ever feel
Stay with it
And never let it be revealed
That your whole world
Was destroyed inside of you
That you just adopted
Another freshly updated world view
But it is a wholly different vulnerability
Exposed between you and me
When I feel what you feel and you feel what I do
There's nowhere to hide
It's intense and it's true
Like you're inside of me and I am inside of you

And I wonder
To myself
And now out loud..
I am no less if you just don't love me
But I somehow
Feel like you came
To a wound
To a question
Or to a thought
And it got on top of you
And it dragged you
Out of feeling
Into it's chambers
Within your brain
It's pain
And Sobering slap
Broke the trance
And out of love you came

Did you not want to ask for me to step aside and witness
Or to leave you alone?
Did you not want me to see you
In your process,
In your home?
I know that you are Divinity
But you have no images of sanctity
To uphold with me
God knows how to hurt
Become lost
Or utilize vice
Just as readily as he can channel sacred advice
And this goddess didn't judge
Wouldn't judge
In fact
Only loved.
Held the space,
Gazed admiringly upon your face.
In your humanness
Like well-worn antique furniture
Your beauty is most revealed.

No matter how much I love you
Your path will always be your own
And no matter where I go
I will always be at home
My own heart is my anchor
Each moment
I savor
Even in excruciating pain
My loving light remains
And I accept reality

Even if you did chose
To share this life with me
We each will need to pull away
At certain seasons and flows
Some things can only be revealed
When we feel totally alone

I can hold a space for that
For truth, no matter what
I can accept the mystery of life ahead
And focus on the moment
And it doesn't stop the intuitive imagery I receive
But it takes two of us choosing it
If it ever will be conceived

So if your heart says no to me
And that may be the truth
I can hold that space and bow
No matter how much I can feel for you
Nothing overrides the truth in each now
Honest feeling is the proof
But sometimes strands of feeling
Become tangled, like string
So I honor you know what choice to make
Because it changes everything
And I am here
For truth
Becoming clear
Through the experiences
Loss, creation and sustaining
Never do I want feigning
My loving light always is remaining

And maybe I'm wrong
This has nothing to do with me
And I can accept that too
this is just my release

Before I let it fade
In order to get it out of me
I had to let you know
What I feel
And the opportunity

And all I am is love and light
And all I want is what's real and right
By no one's standards
But our own

And I hold the space
For truth alone
In love and light
wherever I go.

Thursday, November 14, 2013


You bring me to that fountain of boundless love
You dissolve my form
And melt it into infinite starry skies
No limitations exist between you and I

Now I understand that this love
Is ours and also not ours
Our role is to control it
Not crush it
But aim it
Yes, into each other
But also into every gesture
Every handshake
Into every action
Every breath
Every being
We see
Along the way
Ours is to shine this love
Through our eyes
And pour it openly
Over the landscape
And into the souls
Human, plant and animal

And in trusting the same
Inner knowing which
Beyond all probability
Brought together you and me
Guide ourselves in line
with individual truth
But share those truths and create a third
The connection between you and I
Is an effortless channel of the Divine
And our duty and delight
Is to share this amazing
Loving light

Forgive me my love if I ever get stuck
In loops of immense gratitude
Of celebrating the luck
The grace
That ever showed me your face
My love
Who I have surely known before

We are each other's path
Two together can transcend
And expand much faster
Than independently
And it is so easy
So easy
Because I love you
And from far
My form alone.

We are together
And it's clearly
God's will
That we will
Spread love
Everywhere we go
We were given each other
For each other
And for the benefit
Of this entire world

And you..
I will never be done showing you
Telling you
The way the entire universe loves you through me
Worshipping at the temple of your Divinity
All of my lifetimes
Could not be enough
To exhaust
This love
For you,
My sacred love.

Wednesday, November 13, 2013

How To Direct The Ecstasy

I remember what a day felt like
In times long ago
In the times before I knew
What a yogasana was
Or that God was in everyone

A day was fast
It wasn't much
Nothing special
seemed to happen
I was always half asleep
Living in my own brain

Now that my heart is wide open
And I cultivate awareness
I taste the suchness
Savor many moments
And observe, receive,
Images and intuition
And it is my delight
That everyday holds magic
Countless adventures
Inside my own experience
And in the world
It is all Divine
And because I am aware of this
I live in a miraculous world

But my days are long,
Like four of the old ones,
So please pardon me
For as I'm told
I have too much to say
But that's because my day
Is as full as a week
Is to the unconscious
And I am constantly listening
To eternity whispering to me
In sensations
And images
And inspirations

Days are so rich,
ripe with meaning
Feeling, depth, growth
And I know
I am not the same person when I go to bed
That awoke on the very same pillow

Gazing out the window I see
Nothing but divinity
I am witnessing miracles
And feeling entire universes of joy

And I cannot help but marvel
Cannot resist but to share
This torrent of ecstasy that is pouring through me
But excuse me
I am still learning how to direct it
So it seems.

It is natural to want to pour all of your love into the one or two
That mean the most to you
But once they've had their fill
You must pour that love through your eyes
Through your hands
Through your words
Through your silent listening
Holding the space
In love
For another to unburden their Self

In these polishing stages
Of refinement
I am now learning
How to direct this ecstasy

Tuesday, November 12, 2013

In Our Own Time

When we met
I saw you
As a reflection of me
But rejected the possibility
Though never completely
But I wasn't ready

Love, there's no knowing
In the moment why
But we can't lie
When we aren't ripe
There's no need to rush
The picking,
To hush,
The process..
The clock's ticking
Is a fantasy.

Ageless souls
In their own
I worked
In mine
My way
To You And I

Prepared me
For what would be
As it drew closer
I knew you'd come

I may have thought
I was there before
But nothing can
Shake this
This experience is showing
Me what I always knew
Love could be

Thank God
With all my heart and soul
For all the plans
Every man
Everything that crashed
Every door
Each opened, &
For my wisdom
to stay wide open
In the face
Of devastation
Proven true
Miracles proven
In meeting you
were real to me
But reality
Has made it
Abundantly clear
This can't disappear
Solid knowing
Like I know how to breathe
That this is meant to be
That we are here for mutual love and creativity
And I bow, my head
To the ground
And I now, instead,
Of striving to believe
God is the fabric of Reality
We can explore this through
The connection between you and me

We may have felt it coming
Longing, loving, the energy humming
But now,
Is our time,
Ageless souls
In their own time
Their corresponding

I'm ready..
Now is our time. <3

Show You The Way

Why fight the flow
When you can let go
And grow
Let life show
You the way...
Through your own passion
Don't ration
Your positivity
It's endlessly
In supply 
Don't deny
Your potential 
Don't make
Your light
Let go
Let it glow
Let love show
You the way..

~ follow your passion, love and inner-rightness.. Not always easy, but no excuses, because it's why you exist on earth!!!! 

Blessings for freedom and joy for all beings! Namaste! 

My Sacred Love

Everything we do in each day is an act of worship because life is sacred. The spiritual and the mundane are not separate whatsoever. By bringing our full consciousness and heart to each moment, we bring sacredness from the invisible into the visible world of form. This poem is about how my love for my man, and cherishing the radiance of his soul, is a form of worship for me. I recognize the Divinity within all that is... So that is the place from which we connect.


I want to build an altar
Underneath you
Scatter rose petals at your feet
I want to light incense
Close my eyes
And feel the entire universe within me

I want to set you
on my altar
Like a statue
Not because I am putting you on a pedestal
Or endeavor to restrict you
But because
I feel the Divine in you
So clearly
You remind me
It's within me
And everything
You inspire me
In your energy
To recall
That I too
Exist omnisciently

It's the fabric of life,
But some of us
Cover it over
with heaps of rags
and blankets
But you,
My sweet love,
Expose the sacred fabric
Of your soul
To the light, to the air
And to all the elements
Displaying your love-light for all to see
Selflessly sharing God with us all

I want to touch my head to the ground
By your feet
In humble gratitude
To a universe so sweet
As to,
Against all odds,
Bring us together
To allow me to be your lover

You move me
In a way
Not found

It comes
Here I come
To once again do puja
I know God is real
When I'm near you

And I become God's omniscience
When I lose myself in love with you

But let me light some incense
And touch the temple of your soul
And once again
And be renewed
By the freshness
Of your energy

Our love
My love for you
This shared journey
Has been enough to prove
That God exists
And I see Him
Everywhere I look
But never have I felt it
Quite a magnificently
As I do when I gaze upon you

That is why
When I love you
I am also worshipping the Divine
My intention
In Touching you
In Kissing you
In Cooking for you
In Listening to you
In Loving you
In the life we create together
Is to honor and celebrate
To commemorate
To nurture
The sacredness within you
With all of the sacredness within me.

Sunday, November 10, 2013

When Divinity Makes Love To Divinity

Never could have known
Until I was shown
By experience

But two souls
Perfectly cleansed
Perfectly attuned
But one
Completely one,
Can discover God
Inside each other

Is the fabric
Of reality
And in your heart
I know this to be true
I knew God
Before I knew you
But never did I know
How I could grow
With another
With a lover
Making love
Not to just a body
(A future corpse)
But to my soul
Sacred union
Of all that is masculine
All that's female
In the eyes,
The tongues
The touches
Of lovers
Who know
That God is love-consciousness
And who pour
Their entire souls
Into each others bodies

Like taking two cups
Of water
And pouring them
Into a third bowl

We remain whole
We are individual sparks
Putting our flames together
In the loving ark
Of two bodies
Sacred meditation
That which is the source of all healing

Finding our aims are one:
shining love-light into the dark
Losing ourselves in each moment
Loving life itself

And in our love-play
God becomes a little more real
Divinity revealed
You inside me
The sacredness
Of all
Losing the sense
Of our separateness
Our forms become one
The reunion of all that is
The entire universe whole
In each kiss
Nothing but love and delight

But no one understands
Until their time comes
And they know
From their own
What it is when divinity
Makes love to divinity

Two crystals
Reflecting dancing rainbows
Of love and pure delight
Melting individuality
And choosing
To be one

God is in everything everywhere
And can choose
To inhabit the individual forms
Or merge two
Of those forms into
Not halves..
But Two souls joining
Losing themselves
In love and joy

Reverent honoring
Of the divinity in each other
God worshipping God

Sacred Lover

When Divinity makes love
To Divinity


I believe in 1+1=2
I remain me
And you remain you
But devote ourselves
To the nurturing
Of this love
That has been revealed
As our truth

The proof
Of miracles
In our kiss..

Without improbable

Our first meeting
Could've taken place


With me love
Heaven is not found above
But inside
And in the union of us

In the faces
The places
The lovers
The losses
The pain
The clarity gained

In the hopes
And sorrows
The promising tomorrows
The path of my past was whispering you


I criticized with no malice
The people whose palace
was built
On believing that they were
walking halves
Never whole
Always Alone
Mourning an empty throne
And though I don't condone
That way
Because we are the whole
And wholeness minus wholeness
Still wholeness remains
The value of one or all remains
the same

We are each whole,
You and I
Found it on our own
Each a perfect reflection
Of the universe
Microcosmic macrocosms
Nothing but light and joy
Love and delight
Trusting our insight..

But now
I understand
How one could see
The divinity
Of the merging of two souls,
Meant to be,
As halves

I divine female
And you the male
We create the entire cosmos
I melt:
Out of one body,
Inhabiting two,
And none,
And everything in this universe,
All in one

And your life and peace
Are as dear to me
As my own
Your joy
Is my joy
A perfect reflection
Of each other's light
Two consciousnesses
In the effort
Of living happy and free
In complete flow
With reality

We are nothing
But everything,
But the entire universe,
In two bodies
Joined as one

A sacred
Field of energy
Two souls
Two pieces of the universe
But diverse
Attracted like breath
To the lungs
Light to the eye
It is clear
In you
That all is divine
All I see is you and me
I see you see me
And in you I see
Pure sacredness

If each of us alone
Has the power
To move mountains
Cause fountains
Love to flow
What can we know
What can we reveal
With two hearts
Two minds
And all this love we feel?
What can we create
With two hearts free of hate?

You will uplift millions
And maybe this
Is soul-work for two..
Who feel like one..

Who accept only truth
From self and each other
Sacred lovers
The entire universe loving itself
Love itself loving love itself

Just a magnification
Of the brightest of lights
Through two prisms
Perfectly corresponding
Naturally responding
A unified field of pure love
Two bodies that can form one
Upon will
And will as they will
Because the force of love
is too strong
to remain apart
for very long..

So I think
Now it's shown
My math was
A bit wrong
As it's become known

On our own
We are whole
But together
We are a bigger wholeness
And more greatness
Is possible
With two hearts
Two minds
Two bodies
Two souls
Who know
That they are the light of the sun
And are also one.

Sunday, November 3, 2013

Her Equal

The love She has is cavernous
And amazing
It is filled with the starry night skies
And still room for oceans
For laughter
For travel

This love She has is sacred
And filled with awe
It is vintage
And sharp
And always present

This love She has is so much
It's too much
For those that cannot bear
A strong woman
A woman who knows her worth
A woman who doesn't need the man
But wants him nonetheless
A woman who cannot be controlled
Or hoodwinked
But who will surrender all of her heart
At the throne of the man she deems worthy

But this one has not yet come
And he had better

This woman needs him not to
Give her a child
Or things
Although she may allow him to
But she needs to love him

But he must know his own heart
And fearlessly seek the truth
As she does
And love her
In a way that turns his soul inside out

He must be a man
But sweet and tender with her
Make love to her madly and almost violently
But somehow with a gentleness
Because he loves every inch of her flesh like the goddess' temple
Sees her spirit in her eyes, smile
And hears it in her words
Never harms her
Weep from his soul if he does
With remorse for harming something so precious and ethereal

Their meeting must be alchemical
Seamless connection on all levels
Intellect, heart, body, and soul
He must love her for her sacred depth
And for her innocent wonderment
And pure unabashed celebration of the simplest delights in life
Maybe because he loves these things too
But has not the delicate words by which to capture it
She weaves them like lace
With a smile untroubled by it's eons of past lives
Radiant with timeless knowing and infinite love

He must dance inside his heart at
How she sings as she cooks
Sways as she walks
Dances in the rain
Must feel everything beautiful with her hands
And her wise eyes, like a girl,
Fullness of presence,
Lapping up life like a kitten with cream
Her Pure and complete joy in the experience of life
Must move him to his deepest core
And even if he is quiet
Must evoke the love as vast as the starry night skies within him

She like the sparrow will not allow
For anything less then this
Caliber of man to hold her
Anything less than this
Truest connection
To become more than just
A passing flicker
In the film of her life

Because she knows herself
And nothing can stop her from
Her glorious outcomes
Except allowing herself to once again forget her worth by lying in the wrong man's arms..

She will never do this
Because she now can feel the secret charge
Within each being
The pulls, the repulsions, between them,
And she knows just what level of contact is called for by this

And only the one that pulls her in like gravity holds us to the earth,
The one that cannot resist her,
Cannot forget her,
Cannot let her pass by,
Will not forfeit his opportunity to win her heart
Because he knows she is more than everything he ever wanted
And there is no one else
Once he meets her,
He knows his life will never be the same after her

He, who knows his heart and doesn't fear hers
He, who is infinitely strong
And can speak her language
Brave enough to remove his armor
And love her as she loves him
He, so awe-inspiring inside and out
He may call her his own
He alone is her equal
And may have her fullest light and love for himself
Mind, body, heart and soul

Thursday, October 31, 2013

The Sparrow's Song

We all want to be loved
Hey, we all want to know
That we make someone's heart
Soul Dance

And in my years 
I have seen
Many connections
Soul mates
And fade away
I have no fear

There only is a certain window
I evolve so fast
We are only on the same page
A brief moment
It cannot last
If the other can't 
keep up
With me
This is my reality.

This is how it goes
Nobody knows
Or when
Comes it goes
As soon as one fades
Seems to surface...
There is always one 
Deeper than the rest
And several
Trying their best 
To reach me

Standing my ground, 
staying me, 
not stopping 
to appease

No matter how much
 I want
This one to last...

Give me a few moments
Few breaths
To savor this 
And breathe this love
Into my chest
I cannot rest
If it's a lie
I cannot nest
In a disguise..
I can not 
slow down
I will keep flying
Until I've found
one who isn't lying
Though mildly trying
With best intentions

Just not my match
Purpose pauses
It's not coincidence 
My eyes did catch
Upon your eyes
Within your soul
And recognizing you
Brought me closer to my goal

All you soul mates
That cannot match me
You are lanterns
Guiding me in the night sky
Flying into the breeze

Crisp and refreshing,
Almost biting
But not cruel
This wind stirs me to my depths
It's taking me
Somewhere true

Home is where my heart is
And love is who I am
And I still believe 
There is a love for me
One man

I salute the lanterns
Guiding my flight
Keeping me warm
Momentary delight

But I cannot stop
To stay with you
You would fly with me
If that were true

I love you
I bless you
Thank you, 
Dear Soul

This sparrow 
Must keep flying
Into the unknown.

Sent from my iPhone

Wednesday, October 30, 2013

A Time To Be Still

Thoughts deepen
Focus quickens
Silent earth, Snowed upon
I know how you feel

I am not sad,
I am still.
I am whole but resting in a place of quiet on the edge of a massive potential storm
Potential tropical paradise

High pressure
Of cold air
Cutting through the silliness
Inviting inward resting
Coiled snake awaiting enough warmth to begin the ascent

Not without desire
But elegantly soaking in the stew of this moment
Nestled within itself

Can't you feel what you feel?
Can't you tell what is real?

So I suppose
Those that know
Are rarer than I knew

Even though,
we all feel it
For most only the dormant soul knows
And as for me
I can see
In one breath
All is contained

I can see your future
In our first days
But can you walk into it
Without fear?
Can you resist blaming me for knowing you better than you do?
Your boldness disappears
When reality holds up a mirror
I am the mirror and if you don't like what you see it is not me you have to blame

Shame that more don't commune with reality

This moment is slow
And deep and eternal
Rest before the road
Pulls me along
Once again

The art is in learning how to be still when it is time for stillness
How to be silly when it is time for silliness
How to be present more than you reminisce
How to dream a future so vividly that your imaginings form a shining rope of thought
By which you pull it into becoming real.

You Manifest what you feel
But if you do not guide what you feel
What you will find
Won't be what you desire but what you most fear

Truth above all else
But in order to hear
Once must learn to be still

Sent from my iPhone

Saturday, October 19, 2013

Poison As The Antidote

It's time
I see
I didn't know
I needed to release
Until the poison
Seeped deeply
Wicked up
inside of me
I resisted
In my Pursuit
Of the truth
I strived
To stay alive
And learn I did
Survive I did

I let the acrid
Scour off the shell
I can't blame
it all
on the boys
In men's clothing
But their loathing
Was toxic
To an extraordinary degree
Slowly eating away
At my bliss
Stripping me
Of my freedom
By strapping
Cinder blocks
Of heavy cynicism
And the judgement
of their insecurity
On my delicate

It wasn't theirs alone
it dragged
Old scars
from the well
From many moons
Many lifetimes ago

The heaviness
That I once endured
And fought so hard
To become pure of
A Renaissance
Of joy and ease

And their heavy hands
My delicate figurine form
Ridiculed my grace
And pushed me down
So that they could feel strong
When we were
Face to face

Sometimes you don't know
Until you are ill
When someone doses you slowly
And out of love
You drink your fill
It can take many years
Before you see
That "the one I loved
Was poisoning me"

So the lead you
We're pouring
My throat
When I was
Was not enough
To kill me
Not enough to keep
Me from opening
my eyes
From learning to rise
Once again

And I used
It to learn
How to become
More free
And how to
More sharply attune
To my reality

I watch myself
And though
I was graced
To keep it

I feel the bitter
Pouring out of me
I choke on the bit
Like sawdust and sputum
Violently bitter..

The sway of my hips
My sweetness of tone
My kind, loving gaze
My joy when alone
My peace
My smile
My acceptance

I am slowly floating back to the surface
To the light of me
Back to my beauty
Again I can breathe

You stole my peace
But I used it to purge past wounds
I harbor no regret or ill will
But Your venom now
is just your own

I am once again at home
In my heart
In my life
Than before

I will have bled
The rotten black sap
Viscous and viscous
Out of my soul
Until there is no more
I have survived
And used
Your poison
To heal
And set me free.

Never again
Will I
Let another
Poison me.

Sent from my iPhone

Wednesday, October 16, 2013

Sacred Longing

This is much different than my usual format.. Glad to do something new and different. ;) as the inspiration flows..

Somehow knowing
Time is showing
Unknown made known
One stands alone
Never alone

Jeweled net
Only felt
In the heart
It's showing

Not so hidden
Path less ridden
More work
Less disgust
That left unused
Turns to rust

Of two souls
One love
More than can
Be discovered
By just one
But by two
Purely love
For everything
For no

Light of Love

The light is all it takes to awake me from the night,

Be it the moon, or the screen of my phone, or sunrise.

It finds my eyes, it washes away the sleep,

I've even awoken to the glow of my own heart in-love
more than once.

But that faded into the fabric of my being because promises were given that he couldn't keep.


On the edge of my seat endless eons every single day,

Waiting but not stagnant I cannot allow myself to doubt what I feel.

What we feel is summoning itself towards us,

The more passionately I feel it the faster and harder it comes along.

I will not stop.
I'll sing this song.
I don't care that I've been alone so long.
After years of waking up I can't be so wrong.
I can't be making this up, he'll come along.

I don't always understand the dance,
But I dance on.

I curl my hair, put red lipstick on,

But I do it because it feels pure, it makes me happy, I sing my song,

I never knew I had this much joy and peace within me for way too long.

I don't look so stunning because I need a man,

I know more than a few that'd gladly hold my hand.

I am stunning, because that's me,
And living as anything less would be fighting reality.

And though my moon,
She craves her sun,
My female essence desires male,
I want just one.
I won't settle for less,
I don't want more.
I'm not desperate, nor am I a whore.

Many a good man has vied for my heart
Tried for my heart
But I know before we start its over
Not there
Nor ever shall be
No matter how good on paper,
 not truth
Not reality

And of the ones that I did love
Too quickly the boat capsized
They saw my light
I saw it in their eyes
When the chase was over
They'd run and hide
My HONESTY became sharply real
against the pattern of their inner lies
And the pain of the difference
Was more than they could deny
They left without even saying goodbye
They left the shell of their integrity behind

This level of beauty
Of honesty
Tears a less ready heart to smithereens
It takes many years
To build the strength
To OWN your facts without restraint

So come to me lover
Set fire to my inner moon
Melt my soul
And I'll make you room.

I'll love you like
The moon and stars
Move poets to tears
Move ocean's tide
And if you stay strong
Don't run and hide
And prove yourself true
That your passion abides
I'll follow you
With my every day
Like the entire universe loving you
In every way
Like life itself
touching you
You have to be yourself before you come to me
Own your truth and live in reality

Find me
I want to see you see me
See the spark
Feel the gravity
You come get me
Prove your love
Through every glance
Through actions too
And I'll love you endlessly
Unselfishly and true
I'll give you a love so pure
It's only seen by very few
Received by fewer
Nothing more sacred
Nothing truer


I live on
As if you see me
Because I love what it is to be
Who I am
Like a source of light
Drawing eyes naturally without a fight

But I won't settle
I won't sell my soul
Years of thinking
'close' was enough have taken a toll
And now I want
No one but you
I don't know where you'll come from
But when you do

I know my life
As I have known
Was just preparing me
for an even brighter road

So on the edge of my seat endless eons everyday

I love every moment of this agony
Waiting for you to find me
But it's tearing me from inside
And I won't run and hide

I'll curl my hair, put my red lipstick on
I refuse to be anything less than me
And now it's dawn
So full and deep
I've got evolution to fulfill so I can't sleep
I have a promise to the universe to keep

You'll come along
Unknown when
I'll be singing my song
I won't pretend
That I don't want you
No games
No haste
You have to prove you love me beyond the chase
And when you do
I'll know it's you
Loving divinity
In the forms of my man and lady

Wednesday, October 9, 2013

Release You

I'm not less because you were inconsistent..
I'm not less because you treated me like a whore,
When I gave you respect, devotion, love, honesty, my body, my heart, my soul
and you wanted MORE.

I still have my integrity.
You have a broken image of what you are
and what you THINK you should be.

I have to lose all the pieces of everything.
I have to sit in this intense space.
This immense place,
of deep discomfort,
And I can handle it.

I would've given you the devotion of all my days,
The love of a good woman shouldn't be taken for granted.
You chased me, defaced me, erased me and in your heart,
 fearful resistance supplanted,
All the feelings you declared for me.

All the nightmares of your reality,
You can't erase,
They will follow you wherever you go,
Wherever you call home,
And you chose to face them all alone.

I am not made less because you had to maintain a false sense of superiority,
Just to avoid your inner feelings of inferiority,
You have shown your priorities,
And I see that honesty is NOT ranking highly.

Maybe if I were less,
 you'd still be around,
Because my fearless adherence to the truth wouldn't intimidate you,
You would be able to control me,
Sedate yourself,
 and I wouldn't call you out on it because I'd be less free..

But I'm not and my disgust is not because of me,
And I won't waste my breath blaming it on you and your inconsistency,
I'm only bothered that it takes more than a week to release the love I had for you from deep within me.

I'm not doubting my beauty
I'm not doubting my grace
I'm not wishing you'd come back to me,
Don't even show me your shameful face.

My mind knows you were childish,
And my heart wants no less than a REAL love
to breathe deep into my lungs.
I'm just waiting for my body to release you,
And heal the wounds leveled by your lying tongue.
Your hands never lied, you were cold and CRUEL,
And the judgement in your voice LASHING at ME
 but stemming from within YOU.

You were part of my story,
But you burned down the glory,
You pillaged the beautiful place in which you were held,
You decimated the love you beheld,
You destroyed your throne,
Now you're on your own,
And your place
In my heart
Became as an object
A catalyst
Not a man
No longer priceless
But a dime a dozen

So enjoy your material wasteland,
And I'll hear from you when you realized how tragically you played your hand
Guarantee it'll be too late
You chose your fate
And with this I release you.
God bless you in all you do.
I deserve much better than you.

Monday, August 26, 2013

Stress, Stretching Your Limits, and Transcendence..

The only way to become stronger when you workout is to extend just past your natural, comfortable limits. Well, that truth extends in every direction of life, tangible and intangible alike.

I tell my students regularly that when they practice, they should come to the point of comfort, then let themselves go beyond that, to the realm where it takes work to still breathe rhythmically and keep their facial muscles relaxed. We get to the edge of the comfort zone, and then where we would typically stop, we hover... And breathe.. And burn.. And let the intensity course through our veins and mind. This process is both purifying in our denial of limitation, our bold facing and enveloping of the sensations we may typically run away from, and in the growth it produces. We force ourselves to stretch our awareness to encompass more pieces of information in each split moment, instead of the brain's default maneuver: truncating anything remotely familiar and flattening it to a 2-dimensional version of itself.

This doesn't just happen on the yoga mat, or in the gym, but in our daily lives as well. At least, we are invited into this process, whether we embrace it or not is our choice. We tend to think of stress as something other than life; something we can escape one day, something not present in heaven or nirvana. Stress is ever present though, stress is a major guru in life- the heat and pressure giving us an opportunity and the energy to turn the coal of our untrained mind into the diamond of pure loving awareness and authenticity of spirit.

STRESS AND CHALLENGES ARE NOT OTHER THAN LIFE, SO DON'T KEEP WAITING FOR THEM TO DISAPPEAR BEFORE YOU START LIVING AUTHENTICALLY OR MORE FULLY!! Instead, use stress for what it provides- a potent opportunity for purification and growth. Anyone can be perfectly loving and peaceful on vacation, with zero responsibilities, no time constraints, but it takes an advanced soul to begin to generate love and peace right in the hot mess that is child-rearing, career, time schedules and limitations of time and space. THIS is our opportunity and challenge. THIS is life: life is love... And life is mining for the diamond of love inside yourself and letting its light guide you, not around or avoiding the dark and dangerous areas of life experience, but going right through them, feeling them, aching, hurting, falling, embarrassing yourself, stinging at the mistakes, and this letting that memory of pain motivate you to hold stronger to the truth of your heart in every single situation.

THAT is real life. Those moments where you are completely free from stress are blissful... Pure bliss, and you earn them by learning to dance with stress and welcome it as the training grounds. Eventually, you can handle an astonishing amount of stress without any ill effects, just a great deal of growth. It requires the development of intense self care as well: knowing when to rest, relax, hide, only to recharge and run right back into the ring.

Life is beautiful, amazing, pure love and miracles are unfolding around us and through us constantly. However, stress is part of this gorgeous experience. Stress and other suffering is the catalyst for real growth, real expansion, and the development of true, functional, unshakeable peace.

Let your desire to be a more loving, wise, compassionate, decisive and authentic being pull you through stress, let it motivate your development so that the more it hurts, the more you work on forming habits that express your inner goodness and sense of rightness. Slowly we stretch our limits and retrain our reactions, and down the road a little ways, we can see how far we have truly come. And the journey never stops... This is what it is to be alive as a human being.

Sent from my iPhone