Hold The Space For You

I know you're hurting,
Uncomfortable
Growing
maybe
Writhing under your calm exterior
Confusion under your usual knowing
Barely showing
what you're really feeling
Reeling
Silently enduring
In the middle
Of a big transition
Even gurus
Go through
Because we are all divine
And all human too

I know how it feels, baby
I feel it too.
I'm in the middle of my own.
What if I say
These sweet words to you?...

It doesn't matter
if you don't know who you are
All the love you feel
Even the pain,
The light that shines through you
Is the light of ancient stars

You don't need to say a word
And I will understand
Whether or not you want
to hold my hand
I will hold the space for you
Silently shine my love on you
No attachment to what you find is true
Just holding the space in love and light for you

If you don't know right now
Who you are and what you feel
I can step back quietly
And let you watch it be revealed

Accountability
doesn't often catch up
to people like you and me
Because we are usually the guides
But teacher is a role
I know you know
That role is often turned
But you know how
To maintain peace
So that your inner disintegration
Can't be discerned
You can feel
More than most ever feel
Breathe
Stay with it
And never let it be revealed
That your whole world
Was destroyed inside of you
That you just adopted
Another freshly updated world view
But it is a wholly different vulnerability
Exposed between you and me
When I feel what you feel and you feel what I do
There's nowhere to hide
It's intense and it's true
Like you're inside of me and I am inside of you

And I wonder
To myself
And now out loud..
I am no less if you just don't love me
But I somehow
Feel like you came
To a wound
To a question
Or to a thought
And it got on top of you
And it dragged you
Out of feeling
Into it's chambers
Within your brain
It's pain
And Sobering slap
Broke the trance
And out of love you came

Did you not want to ask for me to step aside and witness
Or to leave you alone?
Did you not want me to see you
In your process,
In your home?
I know that you are Divinity
But you have no images of sanctity
To uphold with me
God knows how to hurt
Become lost
Or utilize vice
Just as readily as he can channel sacred advice
And this goddess didn't judge
Wouldn't judge
In fact
Only loved.
Held the space,
Gazed admiringly upon your face.
In your humanness
Like well-worn antique furniture
Your beauty is most revealed.

No matter how much I love you
Your path will always be your own
And no matter where I go
I will always be at home
My own heart is my anchor
Each moment
I savor
Even in excruciating pain
My loving light remains
And I accept reality
Wholeheartedly

Even if you did chose
To share this life with me
We each will need to pull away
At certain seasons and flows
Some things can only be revealed
When we feel totally alone

I can hold a space for that
For truth, no matter what
I can accept the mystery of life ahead
And focus on the moment
And it doesn't stop the intuitive imagery I receive
But it takes two of us choosing it
If it ever will be conceived

So if your heart says no to me
And that may be the truth
I can hold that space and bow
No matter how much I can feel for you
Nothing overrides the truth in each now
Honest feeling is the proof
But sometimes strands of feeling
Become tangled, like string
So I honor you know what choice to make
Because it changes everything
And I am here
For truth
Becoming clear
Through the experiences
Loss, creation and sustaining
Never do I want feigning
My loving light always is remaining

And maybe I'm wrong
This has nothing to do with me
And I can accept that too
this is just my release
To
Let
You
Go

Before I let it fade
In order to get it out of me
I had to let you know
What I feel
And the opportunity

And all I am is love and light
And all I want is what's real and right
By no one's standards
But our own

And I hold the space
For truth alone
In love and light
wherever I go.

How To Direct The Ecstasy

I remember what a day felt like
In times long ago
In the times before I knew
What a yogasana was
Or that God was in everyone

A day was fast
It wasn't much
Nothing special
seemed to happen
I was always half asleep
Living in my own brain

Now that my heart is wide open
And I cultivate awareness
I taste the suchness
Savor many moments
And observe, receive,
Images and intuition
And it is my delight
That everyday holds magic
Countless adventures
Inside my own experience
And in the world
It is all Divine
And because I am aware of this
I live in a miraculous world

But my days are long,
Like four of the old ones,
So please pardon me
For as I'm told
I have too much to say
But that's because my day
Is as full as a week
Is to the unconscious
And I am constantly listening
To eternity whispering to me
In sensations
And images
And inspirations

Days are so rich,
ripe with meaning
Feeling, depth, growth
And I know
I am not the same person when I go to bed
That awoke on the very same pillow

Gazing out the window I see
Nothing but divinity
I am witnessing miracles
And feeling entire universes of joy
Love
Delight
Beauty

And I cannot help but marvel
Cannot resist but to share
This torrent of ecstasy that is pouring through me
But excuse me
I am still learning how to direct it
So it seems.

It is natural to want to pour all of your love into the one or two
That mean the most to you
But once they've had their fill
You must pour that love through your eyes
Through your hands
Through your words
Through your silent listening
Holding the space
In love
For another to unburden their Self

In these polishing stages
Of refinement
I am now learning
How to direct this ecstasy

What I Learned Today About Life & God and Stuff

How much can we grow in one day? Exponentially, especially on the days we feel ourselves kicking and screaming against the grain. Throw your hands up in the fight against uncontrollable elements of reality and the unknown. Go with feeling. Strive, force, fight to root yourself in love, NO MATTER WHAT!

I did that today, and here is some of the gems I discovered, or the new depth and shine I saw in these perennial wisdoms:

Exfoliation for the soul: The Divine is the fabric of the universe. The strife, the misery, the struggle, the suffering of the world and in your life is like the abrasion of rough material to slough off the tired shell of ignorance, resistance, self-imposed limitations and to enable to know yourself as your truth.. To strengthen you to live your passion and purpose, and to empower you to live love.

Love All Just As it is: Love no matter what is who we are. Everything is radiant loving conscious energy.. We are here to learn to love ourselves and the world and all in it in our perennial imperfection and luscious creative majesty, trial and error, fragility and all. Bodies that will someday fall away and decay like overripe plums falling from the tree, souls that shine through eyes and all the magic and misery of the interfacing of an energy being with a physical form.

BOUNDARIES: Just because our role is to generate equal love for self, creation and all life, doesn't mean we need to subject ourselves to disrespect or abuse. In fact setting healthy boundaries is a form of love.. Self-love and also a lesson to the who is informed of the boundary.

LOVE: Everything, EVERYTHING is an opportunity for this work.. Discovering wisdom, truth, health and LOVE! Omniscient, omnipresent, unconditional and vast love that is what we are made of..

Validation via MIRRORING: we shouldn't seek approval from others and we don't need to justify our truth!!!!!! We don't need to justify self-care!!!!! BUT we all get worn and maladjusted and askew, and keeping positive people in your life and allowing each other to lean a little as needed strengthens both... We are all mirrors of each other's goodness.. By living our love and presence an truth, we present others with a reflection of their greatness and beauty. And we all can stand to hear that our best is more than enough, that we are loved, that we are good.. Not that we don't know, but when we are so tired an harassed by the limitations of this body-soul interface, we blossom from this soul-nourishing reminder.

WE ARE LIMITLESS SOULS (in limited bodies): limitless souls get pissed off when having to face their limitations due to time, space and the needs of the physical form.. We can stretch, bend and transcend many of these limits but at the end of the day, we cannot break them all.. Not today. Accept this. Smile, laugh. Love.

DO EVERYTHING WITH LOVE!!!!!!!!!!!

Stop doing pointless tasks...
And start doing the everyday chores with love... Dishes and cooking..

I decided SO WHAT if most of the few short years I have with my son are spent making food and art.. Mostly food... Extremely nourishing food...?? So what?! If our memories are of our time in the kitchen, what better way to teach my son how to be a man: nourishing his body and those of others, pouring love into his tasks and thus his life, never to half-ass what he does, to take care of self and others, and to share heartfelt conversation with his loved ones, equally exchanging talking and listening, both done from the heart. Why fight reality? Why not make it a sacred experience!!

EVERYTHING IS SACRED!

Don't stop smiling! Be yourself at all costs!!!!

I will not suppress my joy, my love, my awareness, or my feminine style and grace. I will not suppress my wonderment, my girly excitement, my sweetness, or my undying urge to pour loving consciousness into the open hearts of any who cross my path, and to specifically treasure those who walk this life path with me for some time.

Never give up, no matter how rough. If the unknown is threatening, investigate, know what you can. Demystify. Inform yourself. And let go of what can't be googled, like what will happen next week. Be excited. Feel what you feel. But LIVE NOW! LOVE NOW!

And that's most of it.. That's just one day.. A pretty strange and isolated yet interconnected one.

Oh yes And we need to strive to be independent, know ourselves, take responsibility for our own health and happiness.. But God manifests Miracles through us all... So talk to Him with your feelings (no words needed, just feel and dedicate) but talk to the beings I. Your life.. They are God as well, and you are God as well, and so is the stereo and your car and the sky and the dragonfly and the neighbor and the rats and dogs and everything else that is. We are are like cells in the Divine body, all a part of the net of All That Is.

Love and blessings~

Sent from my iPhone